tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-86995797479930659312024-03-12T21:17:57.400-07:00Lessons Learned in Everyday LivingLife lessons from raising a family and being a womanJanet Perryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01770684879072299091noreply@blogger.comBlogger99125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8699579747993065931.post-75355336115613613012014-11-05T23:26:00.012-08:002023-06-19T12:30:15.401-07:00A stay-at-home mom's response to Obama’s “Remarks on Women and the Economy” <div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: arial;"><img border="0" height="369" src="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-Zfu4A8yfiGc/VFsbyyyzJsI/AAAAAAAABJE/ASiEYvJJeeE/w578-h369/stay-at-home%2Bmom.jpeg" width="578" /></span></div></div><h3 style="text-align: center;"><b style="font-family: arial; text-align: left;"><br /></b></h3><h3 style="text-align: center;"><b style="font-family: arial; text-align: left;">The work of SAHMs frequently goes unnoticed </b></h3><div><b style="font-family: arial; text-align: left;"><br /></b></div><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;">Obama is being blamed for insulting stay-at-home moms (SAHMs), and critics are being blamed for taking his speech out of context.</span></div>
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<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-1-0oJ3W5oEk/VFsb1xy8fII/AAAAAAAABJM/7Nd31ReYYlU/s1600/Obama.jpg" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: arial;"><span face=""arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif">First of all, let’s clarify the context. The official White House press release calls the speech given at Rhode Island College (RIC), “Remarks by the President on Women and the Economy.” Therefore, <b>the context is clearly a political speech about the economy (money), so</b></span><b> don’t mistake this for a speech about families or motherhood.</b><span face=""arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif"> Note that he says repeatedly he was there “to ensure that women are full and equal participants in the economy.” In other words, t</span><span face=""arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif">he president’s end goal is to keep women working because, in his words, “having more women in the workforce…[is] good for business.”</span><br />
</span><a name='more'></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: arial;">Of course, we want our president to help protect and strengthen businesses and employees, including female employees. After all, who in good conscience can oppose equal pay for equal work and fair work opportunities for both genders? And paid paternal leave as well as flexible workplace policies have the potential to strengthen families. So, why were SAHMs upset?<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br /></div><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;">I can’t speak for all of them, but as a SAHM myself, I felt his speech allegedly about the economy crossed into another territory, prompting many questions. First of all, having more women in the workforce might be good for business, but is it good for families? Second, are “working families,” as he calls them, only those in which a mother works <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">outside</i> the home? Third, if Obama’s aim is making “paid family leave” the standard, then what does he offer those who never get paid and never leave their job at home? Finally, what might be most offensive to SAHMs are the president’s assertions about “high-quality childhood education.” <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: arial;">In his mind, The Problem is as follows:<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="color: #333333; font-family: arial;"><span><i>“Moms and dads deserve a great place to drop their kids off every day that doesn’t cost them an arm and a leg. We need better childcare, daycare, [and] early childhood education policies. In many states, sending your child to daycare costs more than sending them to a public university. And too often, parents have no choice but to put their kids in cheaper daycare that maybe doesn’t have the kinds of programming that makes a big difference in a child’s development. And sometimes there may just not be any slots, or the best programs may be too far away. And sometimes, someone, usually mom, leaves the workplace to stay home with the kids, which then leaves her earning a lower wage for the rest of her life as a result. And that’s not a choice we want Americans to make.”</i></span><span><i> </i><o:p style="font-size: 9pt;"></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: arial;">In other words, Obama believes:</span></div>
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<li><span style="font-family: arial; text-indent: -0.25in;">Parents are entitled to (“deserve”) great, affordable childcare.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: arial; text-indent: -0.25in;">Someone (“usually mom”) staying home with the children causes economic problems.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: arial; text-indent: -0.25in;">Childcare should not be the deciding factor in moms choosing between staying at home and working.</span></li>
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<span style="font-family: arial;">His solution to The Problem: <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: arial;"><i><span face=""arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif" style="color: #333333; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">“By the end of this decade, let’s enroll 6 million children in high-quality preschool, and let’s make sure that we are making America stronger. That is good for families; it’s also good for the children, because we know investing in high-quality early childhood education makes all the difference in the world, and those kids will do better.”</span><o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: arial;">In other words, Obama believes:</span></div>
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<ul style="text-align: left;">
<li><span style="font-family: arial; text-indent: -0.25in;">Enrolling more children in “high-quality preschool” will ensure that America will be stronger.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: arial; text-indent: -0.25in;">The government knows what is best for families.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">Children in preschool do “better.”</span> </span></li>
</ul>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;">His proposition leaves many unanswered questions, such as:</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
</div>
<ul style="text-align: left;">
<li><span style="font-family: arial; text-indent: -0.25in;">If working “Moms and dads deserve a place to drop their kids off every day,” then what do stay-at-home parents deserve?</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: arial; text-indent: -0.25in;">What of the financial strains of choosing to stay home rather than work?</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: arial; text-indent: -0.25in;">What qualifies a preschool as “high-quality”?</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: arial; text-indent: -0.25in;">How will the government fund enough preschools for six million children?</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: arial; text-indent: -0.25in;">What about the other millions who don’t get to attend?</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: arial; text-indent: -0.25in;">Will all the inferior (“cheaper”) preschools be eliminated?</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: arial; text-indent: -0.25in;">What supporting evidence shows that preschools make America stronger?</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: arial; text-indent: -0.25in;">What does doing “better” mean? Better than if they weren’t in preschool? Better than those not in preschool?</span></li>
</ul>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;">Like other critics, I do not want to be accused of taking President Obama’s words out of context, so let me be clear: I am not opposed to preschool. In fact, all my children attended some form of preschool, but I never assumed it would make “all the difference in the world.” On the contrary, <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">I chose to <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">not</i> work outside the home so <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I </i>could make all the difference in the world to my children.</b><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;">I am also not opposed to women choosing to work outside the home. <b>My concern with the speech is that I can't detect support for those who choose motherhood as a real, full-time career nor do I sense the president considers a mother’s work at home real work, when, in fact, the SAHMs I know are some of the most committed, hard-working people I know.</b> Think about it. Who else devotes themselves to a 24/7/365 job with no pay for years on end? If it were just about money, these mothers might choose differently. (Believe me, SAHMs would love to “get an honest day’s pay for an honest day’s work.”) Ironically, Obama says, “We’ve got to raise our voices to make sure women can take time off to care for a loved one” when SAHMs care for their loved ones day in and day out and never “take time off” from that job.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;">On the one hand, the President endorses “a woman’s right to choose.” Then by the same token, shouldn't the woman who chooses to carry a child also be allowed to choose to raise that child at home instead of in a government-run preschool? Overall, it appears that, rather than elevating the role of parents, Obama is elevating the role of government. Yet, ultimately parents are held responsible for their children. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;">If Obama’s claims are founded, then we should all be in a panic, but <b>fortunately, many parents are even more genuinely concerned than Obama is about the education of their own children.</b> Consequently, they are choosing to stay home to teach them, especially in the early years. In fact, these parents are going above and beyond the ABCs and 123s. Not only are they reading books and singing songs with their children but they are also teaching them in real-life moments how to be polite, how to share, and how to say, “I’m sorry.” In addition, while teaching them proper respect for authority they are also showing them how to serve, how to be compassionate, and how to choose right from wrong. Moreover, they are helping their children make friends and comfort them when they are rejected. Perhaps most importantly, in many cases, these parents are foregoing careers in order to teach their children what it feels like to be loved, held, cherished, and protected. In short, although these teachings are not exclusive to SAHMs, many of these parents are providing some of the "high[est]-quality early childhood education" I can think of. Even if the direct economic impact of such instruction is incalculable, it is certainly “good for families; it’s also good for the children.” <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;">Obama went to the RIC to “<span style="mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">focus on some common-sense steps we can take to help working families,” but isn’t the most common-sense idea to allow parents to decide which preschool education plan best suits their child? <b>Conscripting mothers (or fathers) back into the workforce so they can stay on a steep earning trajectory may increase incomes, but it may also leave children with a deep deficit of love, personal attention, and self-confidence. </b>Parents, not the government, should make that choice.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Admittedly, staying at home is not a possibility for everyone; in some homes, parents need to work to simply make ends meet, and the president’s personal history is a case in point. Such a lifestyle takes sacrifice and exceptional balancing skills; however, it is also true that <b>the sacrifices and contributions of many SAHMs frequently go unnoticed or are simply expected.</b> Any teacher will tell you that at-home parents often make up the backbone of classroom help, carpools, and emergency pickups from school. Moreover, many of them choose to forego the latest cars and fashions in order to stretch their limited resources so they can live on less and remain home more.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;">One line that gets buried in the president's speech is that “When women do well, everybody does well.” I have found this to be true, and women seem to do best when they are given good choices as well as support and validation for their work. In his speech directed principally toward women, Obama seems to provide none of these for SAHMs. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
</div>
Janet Perryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01770684879072299091noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8699579747993065931.post-58873401271379419852014-10-10T07:54:00.009-07:002023-06-19T12:29:37.880-07:00Time traveling<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-_5n_LCUiSQk/VDd4udVvreI/AAAAAAAABGc/bRhlgXW8zi4/s1600/nose%2Bsmelling%2Broll.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: arial;"><img border="0" height="491" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-_5n_LCUiSQk/VDd4udVvreI/AAAAAAAABGc/bRhlgXW8zi4/w491-h491/nose%2Bsmelling%2Broll.jpg" width="491" /></span></a></div><h3 style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: arial;"><b><br /></b></span></h3><h3 style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: arial;"><b>Smells can instantly take us back in time</b></span></h3><div><span style="font-family: arial;"><b><br /></b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;">A few days ago, my daughter called to get my recipe for
wassail punch, a favorite family drink we love to make during both fall and
winter. As a hostess, she undoubtedly wanted to have the heady smell of spices
wafting throughout her home, recreating the warm, happy feelings she associates
with the beverage.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">Just weeks ago, summertime globetrotting photos filled Facebook
profiles and pages, but now, in spite of misleading high temperatures, we are
well into fall. And so begins the season of time traveling. <b>Without boarding a
plane or driving a car, we will begin traveling back in time to ordinary places and bygone events, back to old
feelings that turned nostalgic yet made fresh through familiar smells.</b></span><br />
</span><a name='more'></a><span style="font-family: arial;"><b> </b><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;">I inherited a heightened olfactory sense, which can be both
a blessing and a curse. Hiking along trails, for instance, that are also frequented by goats and horses can
be a nauseating experience for me, but, on the flip side, I also seem to
appreciate the aroma of the backyard jasmine both sooner and longer than anyone
else. For me, just one whiff of Old Spice cologne conjures up hundreds of
memories of my dad. From the feel of his whisker kisses to the sound of his
jingling pocket change, they all come flooding back. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">So, as an odor whiz, I’m a big fan of the intoxicating smells permeating
this time of year. Even with the drought dishing up endless days of
unseasonably hot weather, my spice drawer still has a strong pull upon me, and, like my daughter, I yearn for good smells to fill my home. Hot cinnamon rolls and maple syrup send me back to family breakfasts in the fall. G</span><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">ooey caramel apples</span><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"> are reminiscent of sticky childhood
Halloween parties. Pumpkin bread reminds me of our first Thanksgiving as a married couple when we delivered dozens of mini loaves to our new friends in town. Apple crisp, another
autumn-giving treat, is something I love to share but quite often receive from a
dear friend.</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;">Already the drought has robbed me of some of the cozy
cooking time I’m accustomed to spending this time of year, but it has also
conceded me one very nice bonus: a legitimate excuse to get professional car washes, including the chance to choose a favorite car scent. I always choose vanilla
because it never fails to take me to a happy place, but yesterday when I got my
car washed my nose was confused. The workers accidentally used the baby powder
scent, so instead of memories of freshly baked cookies loitering in my mind, my
thoughts traveled back to the days of soft little baby bottoms and footie
pajamas. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">As trivial as it may seem, smelling is actually really
serious stuff. In her book <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">The Scent of
Desire,</i> Rachel Herz says, “The neurological interconnection between the
sense of smell (olfaction) and emotion is uniquely intimate. These areas of the
brain that process smell and emotion are as intertwined and codependent as any
two regions in the brain could possibly be.” Supporting this idea is the true
story of a popular Australian musician committing suicide </span><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">after a freak bike
accident in which he lost his sense of smell. Evidently, when he lost the ability to smell
his girlfriend, he also lost his drive to live.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">Perhaps we crave the
emotions connected with the smells as much as the smells themselves,</b> or, as
Herz puts it, “Not only do odors trigger emotions, they can also <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">become</i> emotions.” I recently saw this
dramatized in the Disney movie <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">The
Hundred-Foot Journey </i>in which the lead character, a very talented mother-trained
cook from India, studies in Paris to become a world-renowned chef. Although
prestigious, this professional schooling takes him away from the people (and
the food) he loves. Homesick and alone one day, he is offered some homemade Indian food by a colleague who imported authentic spices from their common
mother country. Within seconds of smelling and then eating the food, emotions
flood over the man, bringing him to tears. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;">While we may have upwards of 10,000 taste buds, we actually only
discern five basic tastes: sweet, sour, salty, bitter, and savory. In contrast,
Herz says, “The average nonchalant human nose can discriminate between ten
thousand and forty thousand different odors, and professional
smellers—literally called ‘noses’ in the fragrance industry—and perfumers,
whisky blenders and <span style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">chefs may be able to
discriminate upward of one hundred thousand odors.”</span> No wonder, then, that
even a simple box lunch of Indian food had the ability to transport the chef
back to his roots.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal"><br /></div><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;">Perhaps more than during any other time of the year, these
next few months my nose will send me back to my roots, too. Sooner or later, cooler days will come eventually culminating in Christmas, the granddaddy of
all olfactory holidays, when my little family will gather around our fireplace
hugging bowls of buttered popcorn, stirring hot chocolate with peppermint candy
canes, and reminiscing about Christmases gone by. Surrounded by wonderful
smells, we will let our family stories easily pour out of us, and, with extra
tenderness and good humor, we’ll remember those not with us. </span><o:p></o:p></div>
</div>
Janet Perryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01770684879072299091noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8699579747993065931.post-89402070183977864682014-10-06T05:00:00.007-07:002023-06-19T12:34:22.998-07:00"One nation under God": A plea for humility<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-n0iFgZ_9Ltw/VDG08ZMjjSI/AAAAAAAABF0/iIdl_IyLntc/s1600/One%2BNation%2BUnder%2BGod.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="191" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-n0iFgZ_9Ltw/VDG08ZMjjSI/AAAAAAAABF0/iIdl_IyLntc/w528-h191/One%2BNation%2BUnder%2BGod.jpg" width="528" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Arial;"><b><br /></b></span></div><h3 style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Arial;"><b>"It is impossible to rightly govern a nation without God and the Bible." ~George Washington</b></span></h3><div class="MsoNormal"><br /></div><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial;">On March 14, 2007, a
headline in our local newspaper read, “Congressman is highest-ranking elected
official to admit that he does not believe in God.”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial;">Why, I wondered, after almost 35
years in public office, did Representative Pete Stark decide to disclose this? Was
he trying to win the $1000 prize offered by the Secular Coalition for America,
a group held together by the “far-ranging philosophies” appealing to him?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial;">The article continued,
“Stark gives confession,” aligning himself with 46 other prominent public
leaders who considered themselves “nontheist—a group that includes atheists,
agnostics and other types of secular humanists.” So, what we have here is a
“Stark” contrast. For Christians, the verb “confess” connotes admitting one’s faults
or repenting for having broken laws put in place by a Superior Being, even God.
Christians are under further obligation to “confess God’s hand in all things.”</span></div>
<a name='more'></a><o:p></o:p><div class="MsoNormal"><br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial;">Make no mistake: America’s
Founding Fathers held a profound respect for the freedom of religion. So, is it
imperative we believe in God, and must our public servants also believe in God?
With all due respect, Mr. Stark was neither my next-door neighbor nor my local
grocer; he was an elected official who allegedly represented me. So, given a
choice, <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">I prefer being represented by
someone who does <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">not </i>have all the
answers himself—someone who has the humility and the good sense to petition a
Higher Source for wisdom, insight, direction, and truth. </b>Evidently, I’m not
alone. “Several of Stark’s constituents…were troubled by his lack of religious
faith,” yet he went on to have an uninterrupted 40-year run as a congressman. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial;">If we can’t see the irony in
Mr. Stark’s “confession,” at least we can smell the hypocrisy. Even children
can reason that government leaders agree to take oaths of office by swearing on
the Bible; they pledge allegiance to the flag (the nation), affirming their
loyalty to “one nation under God”; they use a currency that reads, <a href="http://www.treasury.gov/about/education/Pages/in-god-we-trust.aspx#http://www.treasury.gov/about/education/Pages/in-god-we-trust.aspx">“In
God We Trust.”</a> By rejecting the idea of God, nontheists proclaim to lead
“one nation without a god.” In essence, they say, “In ourselves—and other
humans only—we trust.” <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Much can be said about separation of church and
state, but it still stands that our nation was born into the arms of a mother
country whose heart beat for God above.</span></b><span style="font-family: Arial;"> So, have we somehow outgrown the wisdom of George Washington, the
Father of Our Country, who stated, “It is <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">impossible</i>
to rightly govern a nation without God and the Bible”? (italics added)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial;">During the last two
weekends, in contrast to the approach of some government officials, my church
leaders leaned heavily on teachings from the Bible and other scriptures as they
addressed a worldwide congregation at the <a href="https://www.lds.org/general-conference/sessions/2014/10?lang=eng#https://www.lds.org/general-conference/sessions/2014/10?lang=eng">Semiannual
General Conference</a>. Gathered mostly via satellite with <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">many</i> nations "under God," members were instructed by men and women
who openly and humbly acknowledged <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">not </i>having
all the answers. Instead, they testified unequivocally that all truth and answers
can and will come from God. Interestingly, this universal gap in certainty is somehow reassuring because, if God is in the mix, leaders and laymen
alike can choose to be divinely directed.</span><span style="font-family: Arial;"> </span></div>
</div>
Janet Perryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01770684879072299091noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8699579747993065931.post-38308161238127438222014-10-03T05:00:00.006-07:002023-06-19T12:34:46.393-07:00Some things should not come in the form of gifts<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-B2XUTTVKcsI/VC4-_XPuCLI/AAAAAAAABFg/HChTE7Ngz04/s1600/gift%2Bwrapped%2Bin%2Bcomics.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="418" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-B2XUTTVKcsI/VC4-_XPuCLI/AAAAAAAABFg/HChTE7Ngz04/w557-h418/gift%2Bwrapped%2Bin%2Bcomics.jpg" width="557" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Arial;"><span style="font-size: 18px;"><b><br /></b></span></span></div><h3 style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Arial;"><span style="font-size: 18px;"><b>Creative wrapping is no excuse for strange gifts</b></span></span></h3><div class="MsoNormal"><br /></div><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "MS 明朝"; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast;">When we were married,
every bridal registry seemed to include two must-haves: a crockpot
and the <i>Better Homes and Gardens Cookbook</i> with its signature
red-and-white plaid cover. Convinced both were kitchen essentials, I was
crestfallen when we received neither as wedding gifts. Thirty years ago, gift
cards were not so commonplace. Had they been, we might have been given some,
and I might have felt perfectly comfortable buying myself a crockpot and cookbook.
Instead, it took me years to bring myself to buy either one.</span></div>
<a name='more'></a><br />
<div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 13.5pt;">At first, I
supposed I could live without the crockpot, at least for a while, but in those days not having THE cookbook was a little like Americans not
possessing a family Bible or, perhaps more accurately, not owning a copy of Dr.
Spock’s </span><i style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 13.5pt;">Baby and Child Care.</i><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 13.5pt;"> Then about ten years into our
marriage, I saw the unmistakable red-and-white plaid pattern peeking out from
under a stack of books at Costco. There it was! Triumphant, I laid the treasure
in my cart, but before going through the checkout I lost my resolve. I just
couldn’t bring myself to buy that long-lusted-after recipe book. Strange, I
know, but maybe it was that </span><b style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 13.5pt;">I came from a family whose gift-giving
culture was, well, a bit strange.</b></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "MS 明朝"; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast;">In my home of origin,
we had an unspoken rule that no gift receiver ever complained or even showed a
hint of disappointment. On the contrary, we were expected to show enthusiastic,
genuine gratitude without fail for every gift, no matter how small. And small
they were! At Christmastime, my brothers and I would pool our money to buy a bag
full of combs from the drugstore. That’s right: yellow, green, black, red, and
even pink plastic combs in multiple shapes and sizes. Then, to stretch our
whopping $2.79 purchase, we’d split up the bag, wrap a comb for family members,
and wait for them to thrill over their annual gift. So, because our family gave each other such ordinary items, I felt unjustified shelling out money for something
as extravagant as a brand-new cookbook or a shiny ceramic crockpot. </span><span style="color: black; font-family: Times; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "MS 明朝"; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "MS 明朝"; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast;"><br />
Allowing pedestrian items to pass as presents was a learned behavior. Our
Christmas stockings were usually filled with essentials that we’d either worn
out or used up just before the end of December. While other kids woke up to
stockings stuffed with yo-yos and necklaces or Silly Putty and baseball cards,
we’d pull out things like toothpaste and deodorant or bobby pins and acne
medicine. So, when it came to our stockings, we learned to never let our hopes
get too high. Gifts under the tree, on the other hand, held promise, although
sometimes even those would cross the line. One of mine, in particular, I'd call a spectacular
failure.</span><span style="color: black; font-family: Times; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "MS 明朝"; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "MS 明朝"; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast;">I was probably 11 or
12 years old, sitting patiently with my little stack of presents wrapped in the
Sunday comics or in paper recycled from years past. Keenly aware that each was
hard-earned, we all knew to take turns opening gifts one at a time in order for
both the giver and the receiver to properly appreciate the moment.</span><span style="color: black; font-family: Times; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "MS 明朝"; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "MS 明朝"; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast;">That was the year I
got a bra for Christmas. My first one. What do you say to that? "Gee thanks, Mom."</span><span style="color: black; font-family: Times; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "MS 明朝"; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "MS 明朝"; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast;">Another one of our
unwritten family gift-giving rules included modeling articles of
clothing immediately upon receipt. You would think that being in
the thick of puberty, I would have run and hidden and never returned, especially
not wearing my new intimate apparel. To this day, I can’t imagine what in the
world possessed me to stick to the rule. Either I really loved my
mother or I had incredible self-confidence. All I can say is that some things
should definitely <i>not</i> come in the form of gifts!</span><span style="color: black; font-family: Times; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "MS 明朝"; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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Janet Perryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01770684879072299091noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8699579747993065931.post-9547011012800273802014-09-30T06:20:00.005-07:002023-06-19T12:38:01.900-07:00It’s not the end of the world<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-1fa1AbKraL4/VCooPVYXvCI/AAAAAAAABEw/kQtnHjOwU98/s1600/It's%2Bnot%2Bthe%2Bend%2Bof%2Bthe%2Bworld.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="506" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-1fa1AbKraL4/VCooPVYXvCI/AAAAAAAABEw/kQtnHjOwU98/w506-h506/It's%2Bnot%2Bthe%2Bend%2Bof%2Bthe%2Bworld.jpg" width="506" /></a></div><h3 style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: arial;"><b><br /></b></span></h3><h3 style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: arial;"><b>History can help us replace fear with perspective</b></span></h3><div><span style="font-family: arial;"><b><br /></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: arial;">My parents married on Valentine’s Day in 1942, smack dab in
the middle of World War II. While fear and terror encircled the globe, Mom and
Dad circled each other with young love, big dreams, and bright hope for their
future. After having their first child, Dad was shipped off to Europe where he
saw other men, women, and children suffer atrocities so terrible he would
scarcely speak of them the rest of his days. Yet, in spite of the unfathomable
barbarism wreaked by the malevolent triumvirate of Germany, Italy, and Japan, hope would not be conquered. No, <b>the 1940s may have felt like the end of the world,
but it wasn’t.</b></span></div>
<a name='more'></a><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">Twenty years and eleven children after they married, my
parents had me. Born in the early 60s when riots and revolutions reigned, I was
well cocooned from the chaos and confusion of the time. Even though long-held
values and morals were being turned inside out and upside down, and even as vague news
snippets about a pointless war in Vietnam and a charismatic leader named Martin
Luther King, Jr. were swirling around our black-and-white TV, the only real chaos I
knew was quite innocuous: an older brother, not immune from teenage
rebelliousness, grew out his hair and beard and sold tie-dyed leather goods; other
brothers competed too seriously on the basketball court and ended up in a
slugfest; a sister didn’t finish a project, making everyone late for school;
another refused to help pitch in with Saturday-morning jobs; a sister whose
brakes gave out crashed through our garage door; a teenage sister, rejected by
friends, threw herself on the bed, crying uncontrollably. While to us children </span><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">such events</span><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"> </span><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">might have
felt like the end of the world, they really weren’t at all.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">Fast forward to my own motherhood days when two children fought
over which job was harder, protesting “Life isn’t fair!”; the boys’ playful
wrestling inevitably degenerated into a serious fight; our two-year-old painting the brick fireplace before church while wearing his Sunday clothes; a couple years later,
the same child balking at going to church at all (until he could wear more
comfortable shoes); another child rubbing butter and poured milk into the carpet
before I found the mess; my
son blaming <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">me</i> for an unfinished
project; </span><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">our daughter, rejected by friends, feeling inconsolable<i>. </i>The truth is </span><i>I </i><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">added to the heat of my
children’s senseless arguments; </span><i>I </i><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">threw
myself on my bed, in tears and exasperated; </span><i>I</i><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">
backed into another car in my own driveway—twice! Some days I might have </span><i>wished</i><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"> the end of the world would come,
but no such luck.</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal"><br /></div><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;">With the possible exception of “9-11,” the day the Twin
Towers in New York City were attacked by terrorist hijacking airplanes, I have yet to see any crisis
or disaster—be it small or large, private or public—have the power to bring the world to a halt, let alone to an end. In fact, so far never in all of recorded history has that ever happened. No, <b>the human spirit is too strong, too indomitable. All troubles will shrink with time.</b> So, as long as human hearts keep beating and
hoping, the world will go on. </span><o:p></o:p></div>
</div>
Janet Perryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01770684879072299091noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8699579747993065931.post-90682845596127355022014-09-27T11:57:00.006-07:002023-06-19T12:39:08.514-07:00Out of alignment<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-Bz3JoLBlO-c/VCcHt41mfCI/AAAAAAAABD8/JX6DIt8OXe0/s1600/WornTire.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="670" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-Bz3JoLBlO-c/VCcHt41mfCI/AAAAAAAABD8/JX6DIt8OXe0/w444-h670/WornTire.jpg" width="444" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b><span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></b></div><h3 style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b><span style="font-family: arial;">Realignment is done better sooner than later</span></b></h3><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: arial; text-align: left;"><br /></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: arial;">I should have taken my car in sooner. It was pulling to the right, but I ignored that. I was too busy to get it realigned, and, besides, who wants to shell out money just to have the wheels straightened out? But because I procrastinated, those wheels wore down prematurely, and I had to pay a bundle for four new tires.</span></div>
<a name='more'></a><div class="MsoNormal"><br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;">I knew I should have kept my cool. I was sick and tired of
being in the kitchen, but I needed just a little longer to help finish up a
Valentine’s Day treat. Besides, I’d done this kind of project a hundred times
before. Shouldn’t I be able to finish this time as well? But it was all too
much, and I snapped.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It wasn’t pretty,
and I wasn’t nice. And as soon as I got "excused" from the kitchen, I felt bad, and I
later had to apologize to my family. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"><i>"Just as your car runs more smoothly and requires less energy to go faster and farther when the wheels are in perfect alignment, you perform better when your thoughts, feelings, emotions, goals, and values are in balance." </i></span><i style="text-align: right;">~Brian Tra</i><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" style="text-align: right;">cy</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="background: white; border: 1pt none windowtext; color: black; font-family: arial; padding: 0in;"><o:p></o:p></span></i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;">Realignment. Some cultures call it “getting centered.” I call it saying a
prayer, reading the scriptures, going on a walk, taking a salt bath, or, if I’m
really lucky, taking a nap. <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">Most of us
know when our emotional treads our getting worn down, but we often try to push
ahead regardless, which is its own kind of reckless behavior.</b> By neglecting
to fix ourselves, we can damage relationships unwittingly, but, unlike
children, we adults don’t always have the option to stop for a nap or timeout.
So, what can we do to avoid “collisions” in our lives? <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;">We can breathe. Just breathe. I’m not kidding. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;">Several months ago I realized I wasn’t using my lungs properly.
In fact, I was in such bad respiratory shape that when I was not taking very
shallow breaths, I was actually holding my breath altogether! Since then, I’ve had to consciously work on what should come naturally. So, doing yoga (heretofore
the exercise of weirdoes moving in slow motion while burning incense and
chanting) has become a lifesaver. In fact, it’s now an almost essential part of
my days, mostly because it’s re-teaching me what I once came into this world already
knowing how to do: breathe. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><b>Of course, we can’t do yoga all day long any more than we
can avoid stress entirely. </b>However, as Benjamin Franklin said, “An ounce of prevention
is worth a pound of cure.” This is why my tires could have lasted much longer
had I taken the time to regularly align and balance them. Similarly, my work in the
kitchen, though exigent and needful, would have been, in the long run, more helpful and pleasant for everyone if I’d simply had the good sense to take a short break.
<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">We’ve all heard <b>we should put on</b></span><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"><b> </b></span><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"><b>our own proverbial oxygen masks before trying to help others</b> through crises. In the same vein, sometimes
in order to "realign" ourselves, </span><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">quickly</span><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"> </span><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">resetting our thoughts, feelings, and expectations, all we have time for is just one deep breath.</span></span></div>
</div>
Janet Perryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01770684879072299091noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8699579747993065931.post-23069032716491018672014-08-26T15:36:00.007-07:002023-06-19T16:49:12.031-07:00"There's an app for that!"<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhpzuWlHNRNQkJrPvK38-ZKyVlh_2mw7CY75j4yXQ2lzzWjkYKWuCRb1xvLTSto1pffaW7rQbtQRQbOJBFGh0qSjKeq8BgVmkqJeDXTVyAhkWvv_ccZo2PRjsrki6mDMHMaMx7maQhSFqzDJXlfgfgT-5J8GXWtatWFJqypAJQMNfmb4HSOYVv-8V2Tsi6W/s175/app%20old%20lds.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="175" data-original-width="175" height="360" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhpzuWlHNRNQkJrPvK38-ZKyVlh_2mw7CY75j4yXQ2lzzWjkYKWuCRb1xvLTSto1pffaW7rQbtQRQbOJBFGh0qSjKeq8BgVmkqJeDXTVyAhkWvv_ccZo2PRjsrki6mDMHMaMx7maQhSFqzDJXlfgfgT-5J8GXWtatWFJqypAJQMNfmb4HSOYVv-8V2Tsi6W/w360-h360/app%20old%20lds.png" width="360" /></a></div></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: black; font-size: 13.5pt;"><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"><br /></span></span></div>
<h3 style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: arial;"><b>The
Mormon Church is the "Apple" of religions</b></span></span></h3>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: arial;">It’s said
that whenever a problem arises at the Silicon Valley-based company, Apple employees
quip, "There's an app for that!" And they mean it. In other words, those
folks really consider no challenge too daunting, no problem too complicated
that it can’t be solved with a downloadable application to an Apple device.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="color: black;"><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">Similarly,
<b>the Mormon Church offers solutions to everyday problems.</b></span></span><br />
</span><a name='more'></a><span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: arial;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: arial;">For instance,
a few days ago a 6.1 earthquake hit the Bay Area, which shook us up a bit
(literally and figuratively), and yesterday an acquaintance recalled “The Big
One” in 1989. Ironically, at the time she was working for Apple Computer (the
official name back then) in the Public Relations department. Within an hour of
the tremor, she and her boss were horrified to realize the company had no emergency
communication plan. Instead, during the pre-cellphone, pre-Internet era, all
employees’ contact information was stored on paper files inside the office
building, which did no good at all on that fateful October day since the
buildings and parking lots were being evacuated as quickly as possible.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: arial;">You may
think dealing with earthquakes and such lies outside the scope of a religion’s
teachings. Not so with the Mormon Church. We’ve been taught for decades to be
prepared both spiritually <i>and</i> temporally. Specifically, we’re told to store
water and food, set aside necessary medications and important documents, and create family evacuation plans. Furthermore, we’re encouraged to lend
support and expertise while coordinating emergency plans within our extended communities.
<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: arial;">Not long
ago, another example of a Mormon “app” surfaced in a conversation when a newly
baptized friend of mine told me she needed to return to the workforce. I
casually mentioned our Church Employment Centers where she could get help
updating her resume, networking, and practicing her interview skills. “Free of
charge?” she wondered. Yes, the Mormons have you covered! <o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="color: black;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: arial;">And we
don’t stop there. About six months ago when my husband and I were buying
furniture, the saleswoman told us of her passion for family history work.
Unfortunately, in all her research she’d been unable to find records for her maternal
grandmother. So, we referred her to our local Family History Center where the
volunteers and I helped her locate documents verifying her grandmother’s
birthplace and parentage. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: arial;">Strange
as it may seem, members of the Mormon Church are genuinely concerned about
employment, emergencies, and genealogy. However, much more important and far
more powerful are the Mormon teachings of forgiveness, healing, and eternal
families and the application of such eternal doctrines. Have a problem? The
Mormons have an “app” for that! <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;">For more information, check out the following:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><a href="https://www.lds.org/topics/emergency-preparedness?lang=eng">https://www.lds.org/topics/emergency-preparedness?lang=eng</a><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><a href="https://www.lds.org/church/employment?lang=eng">https://www.lds.org/church/employment?lang=eng</a><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><a href="https://familysearch.org/">https://familysearch.org/</a><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><a href="https://www.lds.org/pages/mobileapps/apple?lang=eng">https://www.lds.org/pages/mobileapps/apple?lang=eng</a></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: arial;"><u>Note:</u> In 2019, the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints changed its logo and all its websites to reflect Jesus Christ. So, now the best way to access the church's online resources is through this website: www.churchofjesuschrist.org. </span></div></div>
</div>
Janet Perryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01770684879072299091noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8699579747993065931.post-32274653125730665152014-02-02T16:30:00.007-08:002023-06-19T12:47:12.956-07:00Learning a foreign language<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-RyqzB8Ap00Q/Uu7i1TZitJI/AAAAAAAAAxw/hX1behRaMPA/s1600/foreign+language.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"><img border="0" height="334" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-RyqzB8Ap00Q/Uu7i1TZitJI/AAAAAAAAAxw/hX1behRaMPA/w505-h334/foreign+language.jpg" width="505" /></span></a></div>
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<h3 style="text-align: center;"><b><span style="font-family: arial;">Gerontologese: the language of the older crowd</span></b></h3><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">They say children under age six pick up new
languages most quickly, but I’m not so sure. I’ve been hanging around the older
crowd lately (OK, I <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">am</i> the older
crowd) whose foreign-language skills seem strongly correlated to their age. I’m
not sure what this new language is called, exactly, but I think it’s something
like “gerontologese.” Mostly Latin-based, it’s sprinkled with lots of acronyms
and, mercifully, a few English words.</span><br />
</span><a name='more'></a><span style="font-family: arial;"> <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;">Even<i> I </i>am picking up words in a hurry. For
example, just months before I turned 50, I got “plantar fasciitis.” So, instead
of saying my heels ached so much, I could barely walk, and standing for long
periods of time was unbearable and how in the world was it fair that middle age women
lose fat on their feet and gain it elsewhere, I’d just whip out those two
little words—“plantar fasciitis”—and I’d get knowing responses. “Ahhhh, yes,”
older folks would nod, slowly, “<i>W</i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">e</i>
understand.” I wondered, even though by now “astigmatism” and “cataract” have become household words, what people would say when I told them I had "presbyopia" and, worse, they were certain to get it, too. It's true. Like ducks in a shooting booth, we are eventually all knocked down by aging eye syndrome and have to buy reading glasses to get back in the game. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"><b>They say the best way to learn a new language
is by speaking it,</b> so occasionally I throw around the words I know, but
sometimes I can hardly keep up, especially during those scary, rapid-fire
conversations following a friend’s doctor visit. "He went in for a simple case of rhinorrhea, and the doctor found his allergens were triggering the production of IgE. Now they think he may have a rare form of acute myeloid leukemia."</span><br />
<span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"><br /></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;">Reading books isn’t much better. Honest to
goodness, this is a sentence from a book I just read: <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">“Di-indolemethane (DIM) is the most potent promoter of 2-hydosylase,
the enzyme that helps to correct dysestrogenism by making more
2-hydroxy-estrone and 2-hydroxy-estradiol.”</i> Usually, big words don’t
intimidate me, but I’m still a little new at this. The author had the nerve to
follow up with <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">“This is not
neutraceutical mumbo jumbo.”</i> Really?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;">Mostly, though, I’m holding my own. Just this
month I contracted “<span style="color: black; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">lateral
epicondylitis,” which, it turns out, is actually a misnomer since it’s an <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">“-osis,”</i> not an <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">“-itis.”</i> Believe it or not, as painful as it is to vacuum, pour
water from a jug, or even bend my arm straight anymore, the pathophysiology
does not involve any inflammation. No, tennis elbow is simply a result
of chronic degenerative changes. In other words, I’m just getting old.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
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<span style="font-family: arial;">But don’t tell me an old dog can’t learn new
tricks. I’m 51 and learning to speak a new language! </span></div>
</div>
Janet Perryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01770684879072299091noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8699579747993065931.post-78991387707404976302014-01-23T16:25:00.008-08:002023-06-19T12:55:26.664-07:00Going dark<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-zQ5B15pnq5A/UuGxJkl306I/AAAAAAAAAxA/Sxg2VoptB5o/s1600/candle.jpeg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" style="font-family: arial;"><img border="0" height="341" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-zQ5B15pnq5A/UuGxJkl306I/AAAAAAAAAxA/Sxg2VoptB5o/w516-h341/candle.jpeg" width="516" /></span></a></div><h3 style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></h3><h3 style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: arial;">Writing is my home</span></h3></div><div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on"><span style="font-family: arial;"><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"><br /></span></span></div><div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on"><span style="font-family: arial;"><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">I've just revisited my blog, which I let go dark for more than a year. </span><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"><b>Reading old posts was like getting caught up with old friends, but making the time read them was like . . . well, getting caught up with old friends.</b> You wonder if it might be too much hassle, if it might take too much time, if it might not feel as satisfying and important as you hoped.</span><br />
</span><a name='more'></a><span style="font-family: arial;"><br />
<span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">Fortunately, it felt great. Like old friendships, I'm glad I took the time to create them. </span><br />
<span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"><br /></span>
<span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">Why, you may ask, did you wait so long? Well, I spent the last year working as the CEO and then COO of Shabby Apple, an online vintage dress company I love and whose founder and president I adore. (She happens to be my niece.) She hired me to lead because she lived in New York, much too far away to stay on top of the business. So, instead, I commuted to Utah--a lot. And I was tired! </span><br />
<span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"><br /></span>
<span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">I'm in full recovery mode, though, and feel excited to pick up the pen again, so to speak. In fact, I've even enrolled myself in a writing class. Honestly, I feel much more myself now that I have started writing, made sure I have a stack of unread books piled high on my nightstand, loaded up my iPod with new podcasts, and listened to a couple of audiobooks in my car. <b>Funny how no matter how old we get and how much we seem to change, we return to the things we love. </b></span><br />
<span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"><br /></span>
<span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">It's good to be home. </span></span><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"><br /></span>
</div>
Janet Perryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01770684879072299091noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8699579747993065931.post-49610450825661134702012-11-05T17:27:00.008-08:002023-06-19T12:58:39.323-07:00I’m a Mormon, and I don’t care who knows it<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<!--StartFragment-->
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-6INhwKS9WX8/UJhnHWZIR3I/AAAAAAAAAjU/w-uq5sToaUg/s1600/rulds2.png" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"><img border="0" height="415" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-6INhwKS9WX8/UJhnHWZIR3I/AAAAAAAAAjU/w-uq5sToaUg/w487-h415/rulds2.png" width="487" /></span></a></div><h3 style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></h3><h3 style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: arial;">Living our religion out loud</span></h3><div class="MsoNormal">
<div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;">We’re in the news, we Mormons. It seems everyone is talking
about Mormons these days, thanks mostly to presidential candidate Mitt Romney
whose campaign has caused a journalistic avalanche of articles, editorials,
television interviews, and radio talk shows discussing, if not featuring, <a href="http://www.lds.org/?lang=eng">The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day
Saints</a> and turning “Mormon” into a household word.</span></div>
<a name='more'></a><span style="font-family: arial;"><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"> <o:p></o:p></span><br />
</span><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: arial;">Most of us, however, are everyday people—</span><a href="http://www.nextdoormormon.com/" style="font-family: arial;">“the Mormons next door,”</a><span style="font-family: arial;"> so to
speak—who carpool, work, and volunteer with you. The truth is, as much as we
love to share our beliefs, we try to show great restraint in </span><i style="font-family: arial;">not</i><span style="font-family: arial;"> identifying ourselves by our convictions
right off the bat. Instead, we prefer our behavior, our work ethic, and our good
citizenship to first shape your opinion of us. In fact, we’re kind of flattered
when you ask if we’re Mormon </span><i style="font-family: arial;">after</i><span style="font-family: arial;">
you’ve known us for a while, especially if you’ve noticed we’re just a little “different”
from other people. Yes, we don’t drink or party, but we still manage to be very happy people. Yes, we serve in the community, but we put our best efforts
into our families. Yes, we work hard, but we try to be compassionate and kind
to others.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><b>We don’t try to hide our religion; we try to live it.</b><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;">Still, people are curious, and that’s just fine with us. We
welcome questions. In fact, we have websites designed specifically for that purpose.
We like it when you go to <a href="http://mormon.org/eng/">mormon.org</a> to
read or watch <a href="http://mormon.org/me/9FQQ/Janet">profiles</a> of Mormons
of many colors and stripes. We like it when you discover our values and research
doctrinal topics that we’ve spent good resources trying to explain simply and
clearly. We even trust our young missionaries to chat online with you about
your unanswered questions. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;">We don’t mind talking about our religion openly; after all,
everyone else seems to be doing just that. But some people would rather read
reviews of the Broadway musical <i>The Book
of Mormon</i> than read <a href="http://mormon.org/book-of-mormon">the Book of
Mormon</a> itself. Still, others prefer “reading” the actions of their LDS
friends to actually making a serious study of our doctrine. A little like perusing
Cliff Notes for Mormonism, watching how we Mormons conduct ourselves and live
our day-to-day lives seems to be the shortcut for learning about us. We get
this. Unfortunately, our lives don’t always measure up to the high standards we
ascribe to. <b>You certainly won’t find Mormons claiming to be perfect, but you
might be hard-pressed to find a group trying more earnestly to be so. <o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;">I’m a Mormon, and I don’t care who knows it. In fact, I
would like everyone how my religion shapes me. So, bring on
the questions, and I’ll try to answer them honestly. In the meantime, I’m sure my
actions will continue to speak louder than my words.</span></div>
</div>
<!--EndFragment--></div>
Janet Perryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01770684879072299091noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8699579747993065931.post-10282248992905673052012-10-27T07:50:00.007-07:002023-06-19T13:00:50.266-07:00Just 3 must-haves for the car<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhkOef1OArDYYr0dLTLxGRdGAX8VJLePOYKMVlFCYPDc1knDz2uvg79Ub6mWg00qXXXlcuH_dItTuwgsk0MBULILItvWBzs2LwTl7caPkGyCBN6uuHmjQEODuC0Q_8ATdpC2VTTyU1qyI1I0aLtIxVH4uPjgEXIkvAtH-Uiu3nnM7Q9v56UzbMUyjb7hg/s1200/car%20stuff.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="1200" height="411" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhkOef1OArDYYr0dLTLxGRdGAX8VJLePOYKMVlFCYPDc1knDz2uvg79Ub6mWg00qXXXlcuH_dItTuwgsk0MBULILItvWBzs2LwTl7caPkGyCBN6uuHmjQEODuC0Q_8ATdpC2VTTyU1qyI1I0aLtIxVH4uPjgEXIkvAtH-Uiu3nnM7Q9v56UzbMUyjb7hg/w411-h411/car%20stuff.jpg" width="411" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><h3 style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: arial;"><b>Every good driver carries tricks in the car</b></span></h3><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: arial;"><b><br /></b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">Water doesn’t count. Everyone knows that almost as important
as keeping enough gas in the tank is carrying water in the car at all times.
But beyond that, <b>we all have things we can’t live without when we drive. </b>Even
though I’m down to just one child, I’m still driving a minivan, and the two of
us have become quite attached; in fact, it has become a sort of home on wheels. So, over time I’ve personalized what I keep inside. I can get along without some
things, but others are must-haves for the car. Here are just three:</span><br />
</span><a name='more'></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
</div>
<ol style="text-align: left;">
<li><span style="font-family: arial;"><b>Tissue: </b>Boring, I
know, but essential. When I had lots of younger passengers, baby wipes often doubled
for tissue, but nowadays I’m a little out of the habit of having those around.
Instead, I keep a box of Kleenex in my glove compartment and find it’s one of
the first and last things I reach for when I drive. From wiping a runny nose to
wiping up a mess, I just have to have a tissue handy.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: arial;"><b>Food: </b>A no-brainer, right? Any time of day or night seems to demand having food on hand. Fortunately,
my van has a nifty little drawer under the passenger seat where I stash granola
bars, nuts, and other foods that can last in there for months.
These snacks have saved the day many a time when my kids have forgotten their
lunch or have just been tired and cranky after school. They’ve also given me a boost
when I’ve been out doing errands and couldn’t get back home to satisfy my
hunger. It must be the mom in me, but I love to share my goodies with anyone hungry,
including the homeless on street corners with signs reading, “Need food.”
But my favorite things to share with these people, especially in the winter, are
packets of hot chocolate and instant oatmeal I also keep on hand. I like to think, if they can just
get a cup of hot water somewhere, they’re getting a hot meal.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: arial;"><b>Goodreads:</b> I
actually get a little panicky if I don’t have something to read in my car, so I
tend to tuck magazines in the seatback pockets and put at least one book within
arm’s reach. Of course, with a smartphone now, I don’t have to
worry quite as much about being stranded without reading material, but I just
never know when I might have a few extra minutes to read while waiting to pick up kids or . . . stopping at a red light. (That’s
right. I confess to being a stoplight reader. But I’m not the worst! I have a
friend who actually read a novel <i>while
driving</i> from L.A. to the Bay Area!) Much to the chagrin of other drivers, I
admit to reading many times at stoplights. I passed this habit along to Grant who,
when only a preschooler, would beg me to read “just one page” at a traffic
light and who now rarely leaves the house without his own good read in hand.</span></li>
</ol>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;">Others in the family would insist on their own must-haves
for the car. Ken would probably add hand sanitizer, KaRynn – music, Craig –
chewing gum, and Mark – movies. I’m not sure about Bryan, but it might be jumper
cables. What things do you have to have in your car?</span></div>
<!--EndFragment--></div>
Janet Perryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01770684879072299091noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8699579747993065931.post-90167109941916746182012-10-25T05:58:00.005-07:002023-06-19T13:03:22.739-07:00Beyond glue guns and kitschy crafts<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-HNdrYFQPE5M/UIjBW29EaRI/AAAAAAAAAiY/66IZ4UUfTO8/s1600/Christmas+ornament.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-HNdrYFQPE5M/UIjBW29EaRI/AAAAAAAAAiY/66IZ4UUfTO8/w536-h640/Christmas+ornament.jpg" width="536" /></a></span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on"><br /></div><h3 style="text-align: center;"><b><span style="font-family: arial;">Everyone is better off with a woman in his or her life</span></b></h3><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;">I wanted to throw it away. It was just another failed craft
project I did at a women’s church meeting, but being newly married with very
few Christmas decorations, I really wanted at least one nice ornament for our
tree. Besides, this project seemed <i>so</i>
easy. Instead, I was impatient and tried to hurry along the glass etching then
quickly glue-gunned the ribbon around it, with the end product resulting in a very homemade-looking
ornament.</span></div>
<a name='more'></a><span style="font-family: arial;"><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"><o:p></o:p></span><br />
</span><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: arial;">I’ve hung on to that decoration, which was the beginning of
a long string of botched-up craft projects. There was the tole-painted reindeer
family, for instance. I glue-gunned the </span><i style="font-family: arial;">big</i><span style="font-family: arial;">
tail on the baby reindeer and the </span><i style="font-family: arial;">little </i><span style="font-family: arial;">tail
on the daddy reindeer, and no pulling or twisting could get either tail off. (Glue
guns are not my forte.) What’s worse, my tole-painting skills were such that
many have mistaken the whole lot of them for a family of mice! Nevertheless, I
haul out those critters along with my ornament every Christmas and display them
in some little corner to remind me not so much of days filled with ruined handicrafts;
no, </span><b style="font-family: arial;">they remind me how much I need other women in my life.</b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;">Even though I’ve attended many-more-a-craft-class since
those early young-married years, it’s not
the crafts but the conversations that stand out in my memory. My husband
will tell you that along with every creation I bring home, I also always bring home
a story or two or at least some bit of wisdom from other women in the group. <b>The
truth is women have been crowdsourcing
for centuries but without the help of modern technology.</b> Put a group
of 20 women in a room, and in short order they can compile an excellent
holiday-party menu <i>and </i>carry off the party, share a foolproof remedy for diaper rash <i>and</i> organize a babysitting co-op, and tell you
where to find the best deals in town <i>and</i> show you how to maximize coupons. But don't be fooled; they aren’t limited to domestic
issues. Together, a group of savvy women can also generate a list 10
great books, explain how to get the most out of a 410(k) plan, and teach you how to improve the SEO on your website. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;">I’ve heard it said (in one of those clever little emails
that go viral) that to be both healthy and happy, men should find a
woman and a woman should find a girlfriend. In other words, <b>everyone is better off with a woman in his
or her life.</b> This counsel seemed right, but I wondered if it was actually
true. Sure enough! Studies show women are better off in a myriad of ways when
they have strong female relationships. (See “The Girlfriend Instinct – The
Value of Female Friendships,” <a href="http://womensissues.about.com/od/communityconnection/a/Girlfriends.htm">http://womensissues.about.com/od/communityconnection/a/Girlfriends.htm</a>.)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;">My favorite finding is that <b>being with girlfriends causes us to be bathed in oxytocin,</b> the same
wonderful, feel-good drug released when we give birth and nurse our babies. No
wonder even craft nights can be such a rush! Jokes aside, our feminine need to
hang out with other women is actually quite a serious matter. The study found
that “women without strong social ties risk health issues equivalent to being
overweight or a smoker.” I’d choose ladies’ nights out over obesity and lung
cancer any day! <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;">In my family, we try to get
together for annual sisters' retreats. We eat, we laugh, we walk, we play, we learn, we give
each other foot massages, and, above all, <i>we
talk</i>—almost incessantly. Fortunately, because we tend to steer away from crafts,
I have no reminders of failed projects from those gatherings. Instead, I carry countless warm memories of belly laughs and tender talks about
private challenges, I treasure loads of good advice, and I have a deeper sense of personal affirmation.
Unfortunately, coordinating schedules with 13 busy mothers and grandmothers is
tricky, and I can’t always postpone my need to be with other women. So, in the
meantime, I keep showing up to craft nights even if it means looking beyond the
glue guns and kitschy crafts to bask in the company of women. </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<!--EndFragment--></div>
Janet Perryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01770684879072299091noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8699579747993065931.post-82093704539161579142012-10-22T05:17:00.003-07:002023-06-19T13:05:03.895-07:00Robin Hood is back in town<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjBN7UdDZZfwchHEh2nJDGz6RJ3dyesDufPEapqtrsRl-ckqt82uPQbzIn4OQWLbf6KVSz5nJMXq9qFKNf_geOwHdE7Fq26RKFl9lUBRwfQTZ2rTS0vTwNfdU4q_VSANoRGxC4m3Ylw4-cwx-A0uPTAi0gH9rfOaAENgQEQ_8CGBwSYILzudJJHxNkhyw/s1280/Robin%20Hood.jpeg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="720" data-original-width="1280" height="298" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjBN7UdDZZfwchHEh2nJDGz6RJ3dyesDufPEapqtrsRl-ckqt82uPQbzIn4OQWLbf6KVSz5nJMXq9qFKNf_geOwHdE7Fq26RKFl9lUBRwfQTZ2rTS0vTwNfdU4q_VSANoRGxC4m3Ylw4-cwx-A0uPTAi0gH9rfOaAENgQEQ_8CGBwSYILzudJJHxNkhyw/w528-h298/Robin%20Hood.jpeg" width="528" /></a></div><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"><h3 style="text-align: center;"><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" style="font-family: arial;"><b><br /></b></span></h3><h3 style="text-align: center;"><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" style="font-family: arial;"><b>Let capitalism be the hero</b></span></h3><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: arial;"><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">Sadly, even some of the best political gaffes are lost on
those who don’t understand the difference between capitalism and socialism, so
I keep trying to explain the economy to my children in light of the presidential
candidates’ platforms. To help me, I turned to my son’s 11th-grade</span><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"> Social Studies textbook, whose sum total definition of <b>socialism is </b></span><i><b>“the idea that the government should own and
operate industry for the community as a whole.”</b></i><br />
</span><a name='more'></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: arial;"><i><br /></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: arial;">With that paltry explanation, I can see why my children don’t
get it. Frankly, they could better understand socialism by simply reading
Wikipedia: <i style="font-weight: bold;">“All socialists share the
belief that </i><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Capitalism" style="font-weight: bold;" title="Capitalism"><i><span color="windowtext">capitalism</span></i></a><i><b> unfairly concentrates power and wealth
into a small section of society </b>who control </i><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Capital_(economics)" title="Capital (economics)"><i><span color="windowtext">capital</span></i></a><i>, and creates an </i><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Equality" title="Equality"><i><span color="windowtext">unequal</span></i></a><i>
society. All socialists advocate the creation of an egalitarian society, in
which wealth and power are distributed more evenly.”</i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: arial;"><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"><br /></span>
<span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">This sounds very much like Obama who is now trying to
camouflage his socialist ideas (“the equal distribution of wealth”) as
“opportunity.” So folks, Robin Hood is
back in town. Yes, Obama is trying to rob the rich and give to the poor.
His plan “advocates the creation of an egalitarian society” by taxing the rich more and eliminating or reducing taxes on the other 95% of America. In
other words, as Joe Biden put it, “It’s time [for the rich] to be patriotic.” <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: arial;">To simplify the implications of Obama’s socialistic plan,
let’s talk about a common, childhood moneymaking scheme: selling lemonade. Suppose all the kids in the neighborhood put up lemonade stands around
town to earn money for the movies. At the end of the day, the government
(Obama) says, “Great job, kids. Now give me all your money, and I will give
back to you what you need to go to the movies.” Many are excited because they
didn’t make enough to pay their own way; others are unhappy because they worked
hard to take friends along but now aren’t allowed to; still, others complain
because, even though they made enough money to also buy popcorn and candy, all
they get is a movie ticket. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: arial;">So, the next time kids sell lemonade, what do you suppose
will happen? Who will try to earn more than the next kid? In fact, what will be
the incentive to work at all if, at the end of the day, everyone gets the
same thing? <b>The incentive to work hard
is one of the key differences between Obama’s plan (socialism) and the system
we’ve supported since our nation’s inception (capitalism).</b> <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: arial;"><b><br /></b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: arial;"><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">For decades, millions have immigrated to America precisely to get away from socialism. <a href="http://thehayride.com/2012/10/the-freedom-to-succeed-ad-everybody-is-talking-about-today/">Many came at great sacrifice</a>
because they believed deep down that, given a fair shot at working hard and
implementing their own ideas, they could have a better life here. So now, <b>just
because times are tough, are we going to lose our capitalistic nerve?</b> Are we
going to give up on a system that honors sacrifice,
fosters entrepreneurship, applauds hard work, celebrates creativity, and ultimately </span><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">creates wealth, </span><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">or
are we going to cave into socialism because we’ve lost our drive for and
belief in the American dream?</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">At times like these, it’s tempting to look for a leader to ride
in on a white horse and rescue us from trouble. Instead, <b>why don’t we allow capitalism itself to be our hero?</b> Socialism,
with its deep financial needs to support itself, will always come seeking the
taxpayers’ pocketbook. Remember: whatever we feed will grow. So, if we feed
irresponsibility, laziness, or greed, then they will persist and even thrive. On the
other hand, if we feed incentives to work hard and earn
our own way, then capitalism will flourish and the American dream will live on.</span><o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
<span><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"><i><u>Author's note:</u></i></span><i> This is my first politically charged blog post and hopefully my last. Whether you agree with my position or not, you may find it interesting to note </i><b><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"><i>I wrote this essay during the presidential campaign </i></span><i>four years ago</i></b><i><b>.</b> With only minor editorial changes, it's unfortunately still relevant. </i></span></span></div>
<!--EndFragment--></div>
<div>
<!--EndFragment--></div>
</div>
Janet Perryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01770684879072299091noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8699579747993065931.post-10598859102272712232012-10-04T05:00:00.004-07:002023-06-19T13:06:11.275-07:00Rediscovering parenting tools<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjbk0MAADybt8cqiPGIz_AkJS9s2I6gyRSzfUkVihFJOoClO-zNQrhZlv45cKb6Di3roH5JwSSr9Ou1u_chNsHivA5NLWpvLaJe3733kGd-rQHAxC76Wc4X1bhzWgWM5qasqdpmZEFo-U3qrhqb5C3dII559IiGGTOyQF9xWX2h_y6116DasA1aHANXNg/s1000/How%20To%20Talk%20book%20cover.jpeg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1000" data-original-width="650" height="577" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjbk0MAADybt8cqiPGIz_AkJS9s2I6gyRSzfUkVihFJOoClO-zNQrhZlv45cKb6Di3roH5JwSSr9Ou1u_chNsHivA5NLWpvLaJe3733kGd-rQHAxC76Wc4X1bhzWgWM5qasqdpmZEFo-U3qrhqb5C3dII559IiGGTOyQF9xWX2h_y6116DasA1aHANXNg/w375-h577/How%20To%20Talk%20book%20cover.jpeg" width="375" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><h3 style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b><span style="font-family: arial;">One of my all-time favorite parenting books</span></b></h3><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div>
<span style="font-family: arial;"><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">Growing up, vacuuming was a real chore. Our industrial-strength canister vacuum looked
like R2D2 minus the cool lights and funny voice, and hauling that
clunky thing around was as much work as the vacuuming itself. We’d bang it
against walls and furniture just moving from room to room, and
going up and down stairs was out of the question. Dust mopping, in comparison, was
efficient. Four times as wide as any broom we had in the house, our dust mop with
its nifty little swivel device in the center made it easy to turn at the end of
every pass across our hardwood floors. Good
tools just make life easier.</span><br />
</span><a name='more'></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;">Recently a friend reminded me of some parenting tools that once made my life easier, but I’d forgotten to use them. Jenny Doying, a licensed
family and marriage counselor, taught a room full of us how to get along better
with our children while helping them feel great about themselves. Drawing
heavily on concepts from the book <i>How to Talk
So Kids Will Listen and Listen So Kids Will Talk </i>(Faber and Mazlish),<i> </i>Jenny emphasized
that <b>so much of good parenting lies in
good listening.</b> <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;">Her class triggered a memory of one of the most embarrassing
periods of my life. We’d had our third child and, officially outnumbered, Ken
and I were asked to teach an 8-week parenting course. Week after week, we would
leave our two active toddlers and one screaming baby with the babysitter so we
could go teach others how to raise their kids. To our students, it must have
been painfully obvious we were no parenting experts; in fact, looking back, I’m
quite sure we received this assignment to protect our <i>own </i>children from egregious parenting errors rather than to save other families. I do, however, wish I could
remember more of what we taught because the curriculum was replete with good
ideas (many of which came from the above-mentioned book). One of those, Jenny reminded me, was a tool that at one time I actually did
implement effectively: <b>“Say it with a
word.”</b> That’s right. One word. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: arial;"><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">Our children had a bad habit of leaving their wet towels on
the floor after bath time. Hoping to correct their behavior, I would often go
into a rant, stringing <i>many </i>words
together. So, the concept of using <i>only one
word</i> was foreign to me. Although I could never quite limit myself to just one
word,</span><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"> I did manage to replace my tirade with a
cheery three-word chant. “Wet towel alert!” I’d chirp. And guess what? Tension <i>was </i>diffused and those
towels actually <i>did</i> go back up on the towel bar—like magic!</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">As a mother, I still have a tendency to use too many words
and too few parenting tools. Without realizing it, before Jenny's class, I’d become a little
lackadaisical about being an active listener and about choosing my words
carefully. So, it’s time to stop knocking my way through conversations and </span><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">dust off a few old tools.</span></span></div>
<!--EndFragment--></div>
Janet Perryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01770684879072299091noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8699579747993065931.post-89326478258010183822012-09-29T07:34:00.005-07:002023-06-19T13:07:15.215-07:00Just three reasons I love being 50<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgHxOuIXX7jkS9EDpb68GhfifPzr15jxS4ENGIPW7n5u3I8VVjDqCf64gL2QF9GthF0O9Nox0k7M0cQ2wKvCBRcLAa1aOeHVkUqsA7n7Q3myxS1fY601Mw2D0LSRfsa2hKQMaz7GqTUTBM0X-H3XkZukxRckIx029WOPDZWG1F9B1_MbqIrTMuaVkwXSA/s274/50.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="184" data-original-width="274" height="314" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgHxOuIXX7jkS9EDpb68GhfifPzr15jxS4ENGIPW7n5u3I8VVjDqCf64gL2QF9GthF0O9Nox0k7M0cQ2wKvCBRcLAa1aOeHVkUqsA7n7Q3myxS1fY601Mw2D0LSRfsa2hKQMaz7GqTUTBM0X-H3XkZukxRckIx029WOPDZWG1F9B1_MbqIrTMuaVkwXSA/w468-h314/50.jpg" width="468" /></a></div><h3 style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b><span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></b></h3><h3 style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b><span style="font-family: arial;">Halfway to 100, and life looks good</span></b></h3><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">When my mom turned 50, I
thought she was ancient. After all, half a century sounds pretty old to an
eight-year-old. (Who knew she’d almost double those years of living?) But now
that I stand where she once did, I think this is a vibrant age! In fact, if I
knew 50 was going to be this good, I might have looked forward to my birthday a
little more. It turns out the fifties are great for lots of reasons, but here
are just three:</span><br />
</span><a name='more'></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
</div>
<ol style="text-align: left;">
<li><span style="font-family: arial;"><b>Fitness.</b> Having
uninterrupted time to exercise is a nice perk of this age, but, beyond that, I
know of many fifty-somethings out there running marathons, knocking out
100-mile bike rides, and scaling tall mountain peaks. Being healthy while still
conquering physical feats seems to be the greatest driving motivation behind fitness
in the fifties.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: arial;"><b>Freedom.</b>
My girlfriend calls it “comp time for mothers.” After spending a couple of
decades racing through each day to meet the demands of a growing family and having
to load up the car with kids every time I left the house, I now have freedom to
just jump in the car and go. Being able to spend my days playing or working or
reading or serving is liberating.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: arial;"><b>Friends.</b>
By this time in life, a handful of faithful friends have been with me for my
growing-up years, my college years, and my married and mothering years. We've
shared histories and heartaches; we've shared lessons and laughter. At this
point, I know which friends want to stay connected to me, and staying connected
to them is one of the things that makes turning 50 so fantastic. </span></li>
</ol>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;">I’ll admit I’m not loving
the gray hairs and new wrinkles welcoming me into the fifties, and I’ll admit I'm going
to bed and waking up a little stiffer than I once did, but I’ll take those
things along with the fun this new decade seems to be serving up. </span><span style="font-family: Arial;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<!--EndFragment--></div>
Janet Perryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01770684879072299091noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8699579747993065931.post-34727989921933022522012-09-06T00:55:00.006-07:002023-06-19T18:09:47.339-07:00Just give me a sign!<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-781JojbMN5s/UEhS6WXCyaI/AAAAAAAAAgY/gxImCIP2tyA/s1600/US+Route+93+road+sign.jpeg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="780" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-781JojbMN5s/UEhS6WXCyaI/AAAAAAAAAgY/gxImCIP2tyA/w586-h780/US+Route+93+road+sign.jpeg" width="586" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Arial;"><br /></span></div><div class="MsoNormal">
<h3 style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Should vs. Want</span></h3>
<span style="font-family: Arial;"><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Arial;"><br /></span></div>Yesterday I drove through the state of Idaho. After dropping Grant off at college, Ken and I followed our Google Maps directions as
carefully as we could, working our way across wide-open spaces crisscrossed by
highways. Considering neither of us had ever made the trip before, we did
pretty well until we got a little off track in Twin Falls, where we had to ask
directions from the lone worker at the Reeder Flying Service (airport). “Just
go back across the canal, turn left at the first intersection,” she said
flatly, “then drive about five miles, and you’ll catch 93.”</span></div>
<a name='more'></a><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial;"><i>Canal?</i>
Was there a canal? I’d been trying my best to appreciate the endless bucolic
scenery, but I’m a city girl, and honestly, I didn’t even notice a canal.
<i>Intersection?</i> Why yes, two roads </span><i style="font-family: Arial;">did</i><span style="font-family: Arial;">
cross but without even a stop sign to mark said junction. Nonetheless, we
gulped, crossed our fingers, and turned down the long road, which started out
as more gravel than pavement. </span><b style="font-family: Arial;">We hoped we were on the right path but
saw virtually no road signs to reassure us.</b><span style="font-family: Arial;"> My friends will tell you I
like a good adventure, but wasting time backtracking on a 14-hour drive is not
my idea of a good time.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial;">We
finally did catch Route 93, although, for a long stretch, it didn't have a sign posted either. For some reason, no one we knew had ever mentioned this two-lane
highway was not just a short connecting route. No, we would stay on this lonely road
for a couple hours before we'd have the comfort of seeing signs for I-80. Never
in my life have I been so happy to approach Wells, Nevada, a virtual spit in
the road.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial;">I have a new respect for country folks; they have more faith than
I do.</span></b><span style="font-family: Arial;"> T</span><span style="font-family: Arial;">hey seem to be comfortable navigating across the open territory</span><span style="font-family: Arial;"> b</span><span style="font-family: Arial;">y
just paying attention to the land with very few signs to guide them. I, on the other
hand, was raised in L.A. and came to rely heavily on an overabundance of road signs and other
markers.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial;">Today
I turned fifty years old, and I’m heading into a new phase of life that appears
much less predictable than the first half. Our oldest child just got married
and headed off to graduate school; we helped two other children get settled at their respective universities; another is serving out of the country. </span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Arial;"><br /></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Arial;">So, we’re down to just
one child at home, and I’m not exactly sure what I should be doing with my
extra time. <b>It’s not that I don’t have things I <i>want</i> to
do; it’s just that in the past I’ve known better what I <i>should</i> do.</b> Unlike
my children, I don’t have a set of textbooks to tackle or classes to
attend; instead, I have the freedom to pursue whatever I choose. Sure, I have a
sense of which direction to go, but I worry a little about wasting time
meandering down “gravel roads” leading nowhere in particular, especially since
the next decades, I’m told, will fly by very quickly. I realize this
uncertainty is also part of the excitement, so I only ask one thing: just give
me a sign! </span></div>
<!--EndFragment--></div>
Janet Perryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01770684879072299091noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8699579747993065931.post-8041564775451127932012-08-17T06:56:00.006-07:002023-06-19T13:13:36.442-07:00Surrounded by old friends<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-w6Xh2PYAiuk/UC5KrzfvsAI/AAAAAAAAAf8/mgAjPO06Bf4/s1600/antiques.jpeg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="379" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-w6Xh2PYAiuk/UC5KrzfvsAI/AAAAAAAAAf8/mgAjPO06Bf4/w505-h379/antiques.jpeg" width="505" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"><br /></span></div><h3 style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: arial;">It's healthy to keep friends nearby</span></h3>
<div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: arial;"><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"><b><br /></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"><b>I was only half kidding when I said Mom might love her
furniture more than her own children.</b> When it came time to downsize, she was torn
up for months about having to part with her precious pieces. “Some people just <i>need</i> their things around them,” my
sister tried to explain. (She would know.) Hearing that helped me appreciate Mom’s dilemma
better, and I realized, of course, that she’d invested decades collecting and
refinishing her antiques, but it wasn’t until I pressed Mom a little more that
I finally understood why she was so attached to her possessions. </span><br />
</span><a name='more'></a><span style="font-family: arial;"><br />
<span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">“They’re like
my friends,” she explained. “I spent hours and hours taking off layers and
layers until I finally got down to something really beautiful. <b>People are like that. Sometimes you have to
spend a long time getting beneath the surface, but you can usually find something
lovable.”</b>Mom worked hard to create a history with her tables, chairs, and chests, and <b>history is what being an old friend is all
about.</b> It’s no wonder she’s anguished over giving up her things.</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">Here’s a woman who’s been surrounded by friends from the
moment she was born. With nine siblings, she had instant friends, then she gave
birth to 13 children, some of her best friends. In addition to her aunts and uncles
and multiple cousins, her circle of family friends has expanded over time to
include in-laws, 78 grandchildren, and, at last count, 103 great-grandchildren. </span><span>Besides
family, Mom’s home has always teemed with friends because she’s determined to
get below the “layers” with everyone she meets.</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;">Still, seasons change. At this point, she’s outlived most of
her friends—“I don’t even recognize anyone in the obituaries anymore,” she lamented—and
we’ve all struggled to know what move was best for her, especially since she so
dearly loved her furniture. (One sister and brother-in-law even offered to add a special room to their house so Mom <i>and</i>
her furniture could live with them.) </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;">Finally, last week Mom moved into a retirement facility. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">During the past year, she’s been staying with different
children and has been separated from her things, so it was an emotional reunion
when she entered her new place and was greeted by pictures of her family <i>and </i>her favorite pieces of furniture. </span><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">Fortunately, from the time she moved in, f</span><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">amily members have been with her and called every day. </span><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">Truly, old friends now surround her. </span><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">When I called the other day to check on her, she sounded so
content. “Well, I </span><i>am </i><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">happy,” she
said, “so spread the word!” I</span><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">n a poetic sort of way, her life seems to have
come full circle. Now in her nineties, she lives just a block or two from where her
first childhood home stood. </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;">When life moves on and we’ve passed through its busy seasons, don’t we all hope to still be surrounded by old friends, whatever or
whoever those friends may be? My mom is one lucky lady.</span></div>
</div>
Janet Perryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01770684879072299091noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8699579747993065931.post-37854134511364951432012-08-10T06:57:00.003-07:002023-06-19T13:16:40.215-07:00That’s where you live!<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-Wt9stAWmewc/UCUSjmYtzGI/AAAAAAAAAfM/oxo9LwoKzDg/s1600/G+&+Mom.png" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="505" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-Wt9stAWmewc/UCUSjmYtzGI/AAAAAAAAAfM/oxo9LwoKzDg/w437-h505/G+&+Mom.png" width="437" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<h3 style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: arial;"><b>Where we live is more than a place</b></span></h3><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: arial;"><b><br /></b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: arial;">
Our son Grant gives wonderful bear hugs. He often pulls me
in close to his over-six-foot frame and croons, “<i>That’s</i> where you live!”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: arial;"><b>
They say you can tell a lot about a person by the company
they keep, but you can also tell a lot by knowing where they live</b>—and I don’t
just mean which city or house they live in. In college, I tired quickly of the
standard trio of introductory questions: <i>“What’s
your name? Where are you from? What’s your major?”</i> I have to admit that knowing
where people were from provided at least a small dot on my mental map and it
did tell me <i>something </i>about them—if
they had cold winters, if they grew up by the ocean, or if they were city people
or country folks. What it did <i>not </i>explain,
though, is what <i>kind</i> of home they lived
in. Even a photo of their home and family couldn’t really tell me where they
were <i>from.</i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<a name='more'></a><span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: arial;">
My dad used to say that to really get to know people you
needed to sit at their table and share a meal together. <b>Somehow, breaking bread with people helps barriers go down and gives us
a pulse on the true rhythm of a family.</b> Through the years, Ken and I have
hosted meals for hundreds of people who, like it or not, have learned where we
“live.” They’ve seen us wait to start eating until everyone is served and we've blessed the food. They’ve been teased unexpectedly by Ken, and often at the
end of the meal they’ve seen our grown sons plopping onto his lap. They’ve also seen
the boys laugh as quickly as they fight while KaRynn tries in vain to push away one
brother or another who insists on snuggling up to her at the table. They’ve overheard
me remind our children to put napkins on their laps, take their elbows off the
table, and put butter on their plates before spreading it on their bread. On our
better days, they’ve engaged with us in good, old-fashioned table conversations.
<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: arial;"><b>
I especially like having our children’s friends eat with us.</b>
It doesn’t take too many meals for them to get a pretty good sense of
what we value and how we roll. Knowing where <i>they</i> “live,” on the other hand, is a little trickier. As play dates
turn into teenage hangouts, parents are often instructed, “Just drop me off
here.” So, instead of going inside to meet the parents and take in the surroundings,
we have to enlist other reconnaissance strategies. </span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: arial;"><b><br /></b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: arial;"><b>Carpooling, for instance, has its headaches, but it also has its own
magic. </b>That’s right. Sometimes a parent-driver can actually become
invisible! With a little luck, kids become so caught up in their own
conversations that they actually forget a parent is in their midst. Consequently,
driving can be very informative. I’ve learned what music is cool and which
sports teams are winning or losing, but I’ve also learned more important things
like what kind of work kids do around the house, how well they get along with
their siblings, and whose parents have high academic expectations. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: arial;">
For better or for worse, I haven’t had to carpool much since
I earned the mothering perk of having a teenage driver, so I’ve learned to look
for other ways to learn about my kids’ friends. The best way, of course, is to
build a parent network. Not long ago I went to lunch with the mother of one of
my son’s friends where we had a lovely mom-to-mom conversation, but going
eating out too frequently isn’t very practical, at least for me. Sometimes just calling other parents
for an occasional check-in is helpful, but one of the best ways to learn I’ve found
to learn about other kids is by keeping my ear to the ground at school sporting
events. For some reason, that’s where parents seem to really loosen up. Their language
alone can be quite indicative of where some of these kids “live.” <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: arial;">
In a few weeks, Grant will leave for college, and I will
dearly miss those bear hugs reminding me where I live. What’s more, without
him around I won’t have a teenage driver, so I’ll be back in the
carpooling seat, listening to my boy and his friends the best I can. I wonder if anyone will notice. </span><o:p></o:p></div>
</div>Janet Perryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01770684879072299091noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8699579747993065931.post-19727527865797608312012-08-08T22:25:00.009-07:002023-06-19T17:25:31.882-07:00Timing is everything<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/--HKa4tLCH64/UCNIVE_KUPI/AAAAAAAAAe4/i8lFuQKRmq4/s1600/Alex+Morgan+-+soccer.jpeg" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="315" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/--HKa4tLCH64/UCNIVE_KUPI/AAAAAAAAAe4/i8lFuQKRmq4/w560-h315/Alex+Morgan+-+soccer.jpeg" width="560" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><h3><br /></h3><h3><span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></h3><h3><span style="font-family: arial;">Alex Morgan, USA Women's Soccer player</span></h3><div><span style="font-family: arial;"><span style="font-weight: normal;"><br /></span></span></div></td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: arial;"><b>
From sports to humor, from health to happiness, timing is
everything.</b> You can throw a zinger to first base, but it doesn’t do a bit of
good if the runner beats you there, and who cares if you have a killer swing if
you’ve already missed the pitch? In these Summer Olympics, over and over again
we’ve seen split-second timing make all the difference. Suppose the women’s
water polo coach hadn’t called a timeout with one second left in the game
against Australia; no nail-biting overtime would have ensued. On the other
hand, what if the most recent women’s soccer game <i>hadn’t </i>gone into overtime? We would have missed Alex Morgan’s spectacular
header, the game-winning goal over Canada that sent the U.S. team to the gold-medal round. And half the art of telling a
good joke is timing, too. Even with a great punch line, you won’t get any
laughs if you deliver it too early or too late.</span></div>
<a name='more'></a><span style="font-family: arial;"><br />
</span><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: arial;">
For everyday health matters, we’re bombarded with timing
recommendations. For example, a recent “Success-Nation” post on Facebook advocated that “Drinking water at the correct time maximizes its effectiveness on the human
body.” Apparently, we can avoid strokes and heart attacks by simply waking up
and going to bed, and drinking proper amounts of water. Bogus or not, such
straightforward, life-saving information is constantly served up as gospel
truth. How nice it would be if having good health were that simple!</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: arial;">
Wouldn’t it be great if we could rely on similar clear-cut counsel
for the timing of our critical life choices? What if someone could just tell
us, “Be sure to do this when you’re 12 and that when you turn 20, and if you
marry so-and-so at age 25, your life will be peachy”? Oddly, we don’t fully control the timing of matters far more important than
hitting a home run, cracking a joke, or enjoying good health. As Malcolm Gladwell illustrates in <i>Outliers: The Story of Success,</i> even though the world is wide open to possibilities, much of what we become and whom we meet can be traced back to when and where we happen to be born. In other words, so much of our success is tied to timing. Finding a
good marriage partner, for instance, is so much about timing. In fact, I’ve
always thought choosing a spouse is much like finding a good book; one half is
content and the other half is timing. Let’s face it, <i>Pavilion of Women </i>by Pearl S. Buck is a great read if you’re
married with kids, but it’s probably going to be a bit of a slog if you’re fifteen years
old and still get a thrill out of roller coasters. In the same vein, in your early twenties, you
may walk right past a person who you realize later is a
real catch.<br />
<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: arial;">
Poets have long tried to explain this conundrum. Garrett Hedlund,
in his lyrics to the song “Timing Is Everything,” puts it this way: <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><span><br />
And I could've been another minute late<br />
And you'd never would've crossed my path that day<br />
And when it seems true love is hard to find<br />
That's when love comes along<br />
Just in time<br />
<br />
You can call it fate<br />
Or destiny<br />
Sometimes it really seems like its a mystery<br />
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<span style="font-family: arial;">Cause you can be hurt by
love<br />
Or healed by the same<br />
Timing is everything<br />
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It can happen so fast<br />
Or a little too late<br />
Timing is everything<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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So, <b>plan as we might, we can’t always design the timing of
some of our most important decisions. </b>Even having children isn’t a choice
completely in our hands; in that case, to some degree, we’re all at the mercy of God and nature. So, in many instances, I guess we just have to trust
God’s timing, choose the best we can, and hope our destiny is blessed.</span><br />
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</div>Janet Perryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01770684879072299091noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8699579747993065931.post-29450011706255373452012-07-24T16:54:00.008-07:002023-06-26T19:38:30.289-07:00Just one daughter<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<br /></div><h3 style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: arial;"><b>My daughter KaRynn surprises and delights me</b></span></h3><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: arial;"><b><br /></b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: arial;">I’m the mother of four sons and only one daughter. Growing
up a tomboy surrounded mostly by brothers, I was well prepared to be a
tough-and-tumble kind of mom—the kind that could play catch, rollerblade, and
wrestle with boys, and my sons would probably agree that I have, indeed, been
that kind of a mom. <b>Raising boys has been mostly a “What-you-see-is-what-you-get”
experience</b>—very fun, sometimes funny, and often very physical. No big surprises
there. <b>On the other hand, being a mom of just one girl has been full of
surprises.</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: arial;">My first surprise was KaRynn’s red hair, ever a reminder of
what would emerge as her fiery personality. Although I laughed a lot at her
antics, until she could finally verbalize her thoughts, the girl drove me a
little crazy. She pinched and bit; she threatened boys with rocks; she jumped
off beds recklessly, ending up in the emergency room for stitches; she even
pulled out her own brother’s hair leaving bald spots—three times! Exasperated
and desperate, I told Ken that if KaRynn kept up her trail of violence, I was
certain to be left with no friends of my own.<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: arial;"><b>Given such early signs of independence, I shouldn’t have
been surprised by how early she wanted to make decisions for herself—and
sometimes for others, too. </b>To my horror, by the time she was barely a year old,
she crawled out of her crib and booster seat and never went back. By the time
she hit preschool, she insisted on fixing her hair and picking out her clothes. Once I got past the frustration of not being in control, I started
liking her do-it-myself approach. Have at it, I thought; I’ve got </span><i style="font-family: arial;">plenty </i><span style="font-family: arial;">of other things to worry about.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: arial;">Even though she was usually the youngest in her grade, <b>being
in charge came naturally, so she was often the friend others turned to for fun
and leadership. </b>She was the one who, at age seven, when we were building our
home, led her younger brothers out the second-story window, showing them how to
slide (not climb) down the ladder to the ground. She was also the one who concocted
the harebrained idea of waking up all her young, sleeping cousins in the middle
of the night so they could eat treats with abandon and chat without adult
supervision. </span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: arial;"><b>She was also the one with the courage and backbone enough to speak up
for what was right. </b>In high school, when dance standards were slipping to a
nasty level, she stood virtually alone against her peers and called on administrators
to do their job enforcing the rules. This same grit showed up when she played
sports. When she first joined the water polo team, one of the older teammates
tried to bully her with put-down comments, and KaRynn gave it right back. At
games, parent spectators would marvel that she could be “such a nice girl,” yet,
once in the water, she would take on the meanest of players. No worries; KaRynn
was undaunted. <o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><b><br /></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: arial;"><b>I was surprised by how graciously she blended this
“Don’t-mess-with-me!” side with her deep compassion and her ability to reach so
many people.</b> As a teenager, she confided in me that a certain, very quiet girl
and her family had no food, and she wondered if we could please share some
of ours. Another time a young man didn’t have money to attend an important
school event, so she and her friends pooled their funds to help him buy a
ticket. More than once she helped teachers who were, after all, also human and
sometimes just needed a break. One day she insisted a teacher-friend who felt
sick go home while she wrote the class notes on the board. She also spent long hours
listening to others who seemed to sense in her a kindred spirit. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: arial;"><b>I was also surprised how she moved so easily among groups of
friends—from girls to boys, from young to old, from popular to shy.</b> I once
walked across the high school campus with her, amazed at just how many people
she knew by name. A few years later, just before her mission, Ken and I were on
the BYU campus with her and had a tough time getting from point A to point
B because she kept running into people she knew and seemed to love dearly. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: arial;">Even though I was given just one daughter, I’ve always been so
glad that daughter was KaRynn. During her 18-month mission in New Zealand, I’ve
continued to be both surprised and delighted by her faith, her optimism, her courage, and
her increased love and compassion for everyone she meets. New Zealand will
miss her, but today I’ll be so happy to have my only daughter back home in my arms. </span><o:p></o:p></div>
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Janet Perryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01770684879072299091noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8699579747993065931.post-70944080425408308082012-06-02T16:14:00.010-07:002023-06-25T22:47:42.359-07:00Finding our voices<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><h3><b><span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></b></h3><h3><b><span style="font-family: arial;">Grant and Kelsi please the crowd</span></b></h3></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: arial;"><span face="arial, helvetica, sans-serif">Grant never sings anymore. The truth is I don’t remember him singing an entire song audibly since he was about five years old. Back then, I actually had to shush him once because he was belting out the music above all the rest of the children. But since then he’s refused to sing in church. In fact, he'll rarely even pick up a hymnbook. </span><br />
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<span face="arial, helvetica, sans-serif">So, you can imagine my shock the other night when I saw him on stage, cool as could be, singing a duet with his friend Kelsi whom he’s known forever. While she played the guitar, the two of them sang away as if they’d been doing it every day since they were kids. They’re no rock stars, I realize, but their voices blended well and they sounded great to me. Where had Grant been hiding that voice? </span><br />
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<span face="arial, helvetica, sans-serif">Singing voices are a breed of their own, I suppose, but this experience made us wonder</span><b> just what helps people find their own voices.</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: arial;">Sometimes, people speak out of necessity. My little brother, for example, didn’t say a word until he was well into his second year of life when slipping off my mother’s lap, he cried out in desperation, “Help! Help! I’m falling!” Another case of first words being strung together in a complete sentence comes out of Mooreland, Indiana, where a girl known as "Zippy" was almost three years old before she finally began to talk, and then not until her father threatened to throw away her bottle. “I’ll make a deal with you,” she said in a perfectly clear voice. Shocked, her father listened while she continued, “If you let me keep it, I’ll hide it when company comes and I won’t tell no-body.” No deal for Zippy, unfortunately, but fortunately she found her voice. </span></div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: arial;"><b><br />Haven Kimmel (AKA "Zippy")</b></span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: arial;"><span face=""arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif">I, on the other hand, had no trouble finding my voice very early in life. I attribute this to a family culture of lively conversations, which instilled in me a deep-seated belief that even my young, untested thoughts were welcome and valid. So, it came as quite a surprise to me when my kindergarten teacher, who happened to be new in town, tried to silence me. She asked about my family, and I announced proudly I was the twelfth of 13 children. Having no clue that for years all my older siblings had also attended the same elementary school, she assumed I was making up a big story, as children that age often do. Accused of lying, I protested—loudly, I’m sure. Even still, this woman wouldn’t believe me until she shared my outrageous claim in the teachers’ lounge where she was quickly set straight by several adults. </span><br />
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<span face=""arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif">Later, she had to ask for my forgiveness, but we both had things to learn. I was too young to understand that people don’t always believe children with big voices (and stories), and she was too new to the school to know what kind of person she was dealing with. As a Tanner, I just wasn’t accustomed to being told I couldn’t speak out. Even at four years old, I would have <i>lots</i> of things to say that year, and—teacher or not—she wasn’t about to stop me. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: arial;"><span face=""arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif">I did have to learn to turn down the volume, though. Born with a naturally loud voice (inherited from my dad’s side), I not only had to reduce my decibel level but <b>I also had to learn when to <i>not</i> use my voice, and when to listen to others so they could </b></span><b>find <i>their</i> voice.</b><span face=""arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif"> I was reminded of this recently when I watched the movie </span><i>Shadowlands,</i><span face=""arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif"> the story of C.S. Lewis’s adult life as a professor at Oxford University. A magnificent thinker and writer, Lewis made a habit of asking probing questions but usually with the intent to insert his own answers into the ensuing discussions. Not until he experienced real romantic love for the first time did he expose himself to honest, personal scrutiny. This vulnerability, this new willingness to let another give him a fresh perspective of himself, both frightened and befuddled him. Could it be he didn’t really have all the answers? </span><br />
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<span face=""arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif">Shortly after marrying, Lewis lost his wife to cancer. Up until then, his own brilliant intellect had been enough to help him reason his way through life’s complexities, but now he found himself nearly defenseless against uncharacteristic emotional pain and hopelessly perplexed by unanswerable questions. To his credit, after losing his wife, he changed. He changed the way he thought and, perhaps more importantly, he changed the way he taught. Instead of predetermining the path his lectures would go, he chose to genuinely listen to his students, helping them find </span><span face=""arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif">their </span><span face=""arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif">voices while they helped him discover the truth.</span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: arial;"><span face=""arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif"><br /></span></span></div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: arial;"><img border="0" height="421" src="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-CWipc0H0_R8/T8qE0ctBoSI/AAAAAAAAAeM/Y_7P3OXEExY/w562-h421/CS+Lewis.jpg" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;" width="562" /></span></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: arial;"><b><br />Professor<span> and author </span>C.S. Lewis<br /><br /></b></span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: arial;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-CWipc0H0_R8/T8qE0ctBoSI/AAAAAAAAAeM/Y_7P3OXEExY/s1600/CS+Lewis.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"></a></span></div>
<span style="font-family: arial;"><span face="arial, helvetica, sans-serif">I imagine Lewis’s pedagogical turnaround was no small thing at an institution such as Oxford. After all, for centuries education has promoted the time-honored tradition of professors lecturing and students listening, almost reverentially. This approach has not been unique to education either. Typically, those with the most credentials, experience, fame, connections, or money have been awarded the biggest voices. </span><br />
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<span face="arial, helvetica, sans-serif">Now, however, the rules are changing dramatically because millions are finding their voice and making it heard, and this shift is changing the world, says Sheryl Sandberg, Chief Operating Officer at Facebook. Last week Sandberg returned to Harvard Business School, her alma mater of 17 years, to deliver the commencement address in which she recalled what the world was like not that long ago:</span><br />
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<i><span style="font-family: arial;">“It used to be that in order to reach more people than you could talk to in a day, you had to be rich and famous and powerful. You had to be a celebrity, a politician, a CEO. But that’s not true today. <b>Now ordinary people have a voice, </b>not just those of us lucky to go to HBS, but anyone with access to Facebook, Twitter, a mobile phone. <b>This is disrupting traditional power structures and leveling traditional hierarchy. Control and power are shifting from institutions to individuals, from the historically powerful to the historically powerless. </b>And all of this is happening so much faster than I could have imagined when I was sitting where you are today – and Mark Zuckerberg was 11 years old.” </span></i></div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-V-ELde3_LhQ/T8qFFW2keNI/AAAAAAAAAeU/iC73lzjQr0g/s1600/Sandberg+at+HBS.jpeg" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><span style="font-family: arial;"><img border="0" height="381" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-V-ELde3_LhQ/T8qFFW2keNI/AAAAAAAAAeU/iC73lzjQr0g/w543-h381/Sandberg+at+HBS.jpeg" width="543" /></span></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: arial;"><b><br />Sheryl Sandberg gave the </b></span><span style="font-family: arial;"><b>commencement address</b></span><span style="font-family: arial;"><b><br />at the Harvard Business School </b></span></td></tr></tbody></table>
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<span style="font-family: arial;">It’s true. Today, by simply speaking up, commonplace citizens are literally starting revolutions. Through technology that invites them to talk, share, and comment, otherwise quiet or shy people have found their voices, and they are sharing their opinions freely and widely.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: arial;">Of course, <b>the world will never be short on people with big voices, but sometimes even these people, due to unexpected circumstances, come to find a more genuine voice.</b> Such was the case for Neil Selinger, one of America’s premier plaintiffs’ securities lawyers. Practicing in New York for 30 years, Selinger decided to retire at age 57 in order to tutor at the local high school, volunteer for Habitat for Humanity, and pursue his interest in writing at a nearby college. Shortly thereafter, he was diagnosed with ALS (Lou Gehrig’s Disease), which meant he would eventually have no voluntary muscle movement or coordination. In just four years, he would die. </span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: arial;">Here was a man who, as an attorney, was no stranger to using his voice; however, after becoming ill, he found new purpose and meaning in his words. He still considered writing a discipline, but now he wrote to share his innermost thoughts and feelings and to candidly expose his life's struggles and joys. This required shedding his lawyer's voice. Said Salinger, <b>“As my muscles weakened, my writing became stronger. As I slowly lost my speech, I gained my voice.” </b></span></div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: arial;"><b><br />Neil Selinger at home with his wife after contracting ALS<br /><br /></b></span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: arial;"><b>Big or small, all voices these days should have a shot at being heard. </b>Just a few decades ago when I was in college, making long-distance calls home was very expensive, and we still had to pay to send a written communication. Consequently, I didn’t often hear my parents’ voices and they rarely heard mine. In contrast, Grant leaves for college in just a few months, and although I won’t be hearing him sing, I’ll count on hearing from him through phone calls, emails, text messages, Facebook posts, tweets, or however he chooses to be heard.</span></div>
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Janet Perryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01770684879072299091noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8699579747993065931.post-32273959208820477352012-05-26T23:33:00.009-07:002023-06-19T17:23:16.151-07:00Don’t let geometry define you<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><h3><br /></h3><h3><b><span style="font-family: arial;">The "Given" is essential in geometry and in life</span></b></h3></td></tr></tbody></table><div class="MsoNormal"><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial";">We’ve had more than one child struggle with geometry. Even Bryan, our son who ended up majoring in math, recently admitted at his college graduation that he was “not a geometry guy.” Along with many others in high school, he had a tough time grasping the spatial relationships of points, lines, angles, and figures. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial";">“I don’t want to major in triangles!” complained another smart but disgruntled guy who joined the ranks of those forced to face the world of geometry. Like Alice arriving in Wonderland, many frustrated teenagers often find themselves puzzled and bewildered by unfamiliar rules and strange new ways of looking at circles and other once-ordinary objects.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial";">Although many have issued a resounding “Goodbye and good riddance!” </span><span style="font-family: "arial";">at the end of taking the class</span><span style="font-family: "arial";">,</span><b style="font-family: Arial;"> some of the smartest people I know have muddled through geometry.</b><span style="font-family: "arial";"> As a matter of fact, one such friend managed to get an almost perfect score on the math section of the SAT. </span><span style="font-family: "arial";">Another, my sister, is one of the brightest, most well-read people I know. S</span><span style="font-family: "arial";">he can't remember any corollaries or theorems, but s</span><span style="font-family: "arial";">he can recall names and motives of minor Shakespeare characters; she may not be able to recite the formula for calculating the area of a circle, but she can casually take in an article from </span><i style="font-family: Arial;">The Economist</i><span style="font-family: "arial";"> or <i>The New Yorker </i>while simultaneously contributing to a complex political discussion. No, geometry was not her forte. However, u</span><span style="font-family: "arial";">nlike many students, she managed to find a life lesson in high-school geometry: the principle of the “Given.”</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial";">Every proof in geometry provides some initial information, some facts are known as the “Given.” </span><span style="font-family: "arial";">Using these pieces of evidence, we're required t</span><span style="font-family: "arial";">o complete the proof by</span><span style="font-family: "arial";"> creating a series of logically deduced statements. <b>C</b></span><span style="font-family: "arial";"><b>oming from the same “Given” is essential n</b></span><span style="font-family: "arial";"><b>ot only when we solve geometry proofs but also when we participate in real-life deliberations. </b>In other words, as my sister realized, </span><span style="font-family: "arial";">when two people can’t agree on something, it’s often because they don’t come from the same “Given.”</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial";">I've seen this less conventional application of geometry bear itself out many times. For example, before serving a mission for my church, I had a friend warn me that I would not have much success teaching people if, together, we didn’t first agree about the nature of God. That is, if we didn’t come from the same “Given,” I would have very little chance of teaching what I considered additional truths. He was right. You can’t, for instance, convince a Buddhist to be baptized if he doesn’t first believe Jesus Christ is the Savior. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial";">Similarly, I’ve found it's tough to persuade my children to do their homework if, at the outset, we can’t agree that lifelong learning is up to them and that future opportunities depend on how well they perform in school today. </span><span style="font-family: "arial";">In other words</span><span style="font-family: "arial";">,<b> it does little good to beat the drum with my conclusion if we can’t all hear the same prelude music.</b></span><o:p></o:p></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial";">Geometry is certainly not for everyone, but, for some reason, it's required for every high school student. So, although our final performance in the class should not define us, geometry principles can help shape our conversations. Furthermore, we can all agree to look beyond circles and triangles for larger life lessons. In fact, that’s a given.</span></div></div><div class="MsoNormal">
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Janet Perryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01770684879072299091noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8699579747993065931.post-59085710501647061992012-05-24T22:49:00.009-07:002023-06-25T22:45:02.387-07:00Hiding our passions<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><b><span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></b><h3><b><span style="font-family: arial;">We're lucky when passions and obligations intersect</span></b></h3><b><span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></b></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: arial;"><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">For a long time, we had to tuck away Mark’s Harry Potter audiobooks in my drawers. During that same time, we stuffed piles of Grant's favorite books under our bed and buried his Game Boy in a secret place. For a briefer period of time, Ken tried unsuccessfully to conceal Craig’s guitar and ukulele in our closet. Most of these attempts were in vain, however, because somehow the boys always managed to find their cherished CDs, books, or instruments and return to their pleasures.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: arial;">None of their passions was evil in and of itself; it’s just that their obsessions were often more enticing than their homework and family time. Naturally, this caused some conflicts, but that was no surprise. After all, don’t we all have our special passions we just can’t seem to leave alone?<b> No matter how pressing other priorities seem to be, we somehow make time for what we love.</b><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: arial;">Usually, we’re not challenged when choosing good over bad. Instead, we tend to grapple with muddier choices, often choosing between something pleasing and something truly important. In this regard, Dallin H. Oaks shared some helpful parameters when he said, “As we consider various choices, we should remember that it is not enough that something is good. Other choices are better, and still, others are best. Even though a particular choice is more costly, its far greater value may make it the best choice of all.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: arial;">So, just how do we decide what is better than good? And what deserves our best attention? Furthermore, how can we live in the moment while also choosing well for the future? <o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: arial;"><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">I found such perplexing questions to be most pressing during my college years when school deadlines seemed to constantly compete with delicious distractions. The struggle didn't end there, though. The tension between relaxation and responsibility continues to pull at us throughout our lives, each day filled with ambiguity. </span><br />
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<span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">One time, long after college and well into the child-rearing years, Ken and I made arrangements to spend part of a 3-day weekend with some friends. Although they really could have used some help painting their newly remodeled house, the wife had the good sense to insist we all go swimming instead, saying, “Years from now our kids will remember us playing with them in the pool, not painting the ceiling.” That day she helped us create memories so our children would have stories to tell.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: arial;"><span><b>Stories can help us even long before we ever make a choice.</b> Let me explain. </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-family: arial;"><span><br /></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-family: arial;"><span>The book <i>The Art of the Long View,</i> by Peter Schwartz, </span><span>p</span><span>romotes one basic principle: </span><span>scenarios (or stories) provide one of the best tools for accurately projecting into the future. </span><span>If this is true, then we can use stories to imagine what will happen if we make certain choices (or not). For example, recently Ken asked some of our older children as well as their cousins to share with Grant, who will soon be going away to school, their best advice for a new college student. One by one, each shared experiences of learning to balance work and play. Their stories made it easier for Grant to imagine what kind of choices he will need to make to be a good student.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: arial;"><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"><span>Of course, <b>I don’t know if it’s possible to put aside our passions entirely; we will probably always be driven to do those things we love the most.</b> Mark still loves listening to his Harry Potter CDs, Grant still finds time to read for long periods of time, and, Craig can't keep from playing his guitar. I, myself, keep reading materials at the ready everywhere--in the car, on my nightstand, in the bathroom, and in my purse.</span></span><br />
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<span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"><span><b>When we're really lucky, the things that delight us also intersect with our work.</b> Such was the case of my English-major friend who was laughing aloud while reading a book for class. Her roommates didn't think it quite fair she could be having so much fun doing homework. </span></span><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">I hope to be as lucky as I both </span><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">meet obligations while also following my passions.</span></span></div>
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Janet Perryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01770684879072299091noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8699579747993065931.post-69843626574956455872012-05-16T05:58:00.007-07:002023-06-19T13:25:33.916-07:00Just 3 foods meant to be shared<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi-fDal5zz8M0XqKQAuuNvgWrYnMngvwYwOUuSuiJU4tup6ySUfoVC8ZzKXFZPJMNaEkSwLuX_ggRqjILowDUdrrKxpOcMH6X_6Pni2FPoT4WoWeG7qyAkNy5p-RFZPac8tV9Ohuqly7THNMecNbw0HUQ8bjz1dvT0IqOelBhoEaACvc_zqWV4Gqb2-Hw/s1200/ice%20cream%20sharing.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="901" data-original-width="1200" height="343" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi-fDal5zz8M0XqKQAuuNvgWrYnMngvwYwOUuSuiJU4tup6ySUfoVC8ZzKXFZPJMNaEkSwLuX_ggRqjILowDUdrrKxpOcMH6X_6Pni2FPoT4WoWeG7qyAkNy5p-RFZPac8tV9Ohuqly7THNMecNbw0HUQ8bjz1dvT0IqOelBhoEaACvc_zqWV4Gqb2-Hw/w457-h343/ice%20cream%20sharing.jpg" width="457" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><h3 style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: arial;"><b>Eating with others is just more fun</b></span></h3>
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<span style="font-family: "arial";">Emeril Lagasse, the flamboyant American celebrity chef, says, </span><span style="font-family: "arial";"><b>“Food is meant to be shared, especially with friends like you."</b></span><span style="font-family: "arial";"><b> </b>Although not universally true of </span><i style="font-family: Arial;">all</i><span style="font-family: "arial";"> food, some foods are, indeed, meant to be shared and have the power to bring us together with friends—old and new. Besides some of the obvious choices, such as chips and dip, pizza, and fondue, the </span><span style="font-family: "arial";">irresistible and tantalizing aromas of </span><span style="font-family: "arial";">certain foods seem to invite us to enjoy eating them with others. Other foods are simply too much work to make for one person. Here are just three:</span><br />
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<li><b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="font-family: "arial";">Homemade bread:</span></b><span style="font-family: "arial"; text-indent: -0.25in;"> There’s a good reason we use the phrase “break bread together.” Especially when it comes hot out of the oven, bread satisfies just about everyone I know. But it’s the “Mmms!” all around that makes eating it so pleasing and that makes everyone feel they have their own personal piece of deliciousness.</span></li>
<li><b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="font-family: "arial";">Popcorn:</span></b><span style="font-family: "arial"; text-indent: -0.25in;"> Some would argue popcorn isn’t really a food; it’s merely a snack. Regardless, this ubiquitous fare, by design, can feed a crowd of any size. Even if you buy your own popcorn at the movies, there’s a certain understanding that you should at least <i>offer </i>to share it.</span></li>
<li><b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="font-family: "arial";">Homemade ice cream:*</span></b><span style="font-family: "arial"; text-indent: -0.25in;"> Not only is this treat better shared but its preparation should also be a collective effort. Imagine making homemade ice cream just for yourself, and you’ll imagine a very lonely person. Understanding this explains, perhaps, why my friend still uses an old-fashioned, hand-crank ice cream maker. This method gives lots of people a chance to “own” the final product.</span></li>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;"><b><span style="font-family: "arial";">*</span></b><span style="font-family: "arial";">As a side note, one of our family’s favorite treats is Ben and Jerry’s Ice Cream. O</span></span><span style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: x-small;">ccasionally, t</span><span style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: x-small;">o have a shared food experience, we buy several pint containers of different flavors and then pass them around the table for everyone to share. Everyone, that is, except for me. While the rest of the family has the courtesy to eat the equivalent of about one-half of a container, I am loath to give up my pint of Crème </span><span style="background-color: white; font-family: "arial"; font-size: x-small;">Brûlée</span><span style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: x-small;">. When it comes to that particular flavor, I simply have no self-control (and I mean zero, zilch, nada). Instead, I’ve been known to shamelessly down a whole pint in one sitting. Worse yet, if anyone dares to leave leftovers of the same flavor in the freezer, I hunt it down and devour it.</span></div>
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Janet Perryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01770684879072299091noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8699579747993065931.post-80762389440153123942012-05-12T08:24:00.018-07:002023-06-19T13:37:24.915-07:00Strong Women<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: arial;"><b><br />Black Widow, an <i>Avengers </i>superhero,<i> </i>is an admirably strong woman<br /><br /></b></span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: arial;"><span>I’m not a big fan of
superhero movies, but, I’ve got to admit, I loved that opening scene in </span><i>The Avengers </i><span>when Black Widow, tied down
to a chair, manages to break free, take out every man in the room, and coolly
walk away in her skin-tight, black jumpsuit. Immediately, she won my respect, and I
was anxious to see the next scene packed with her superpowers on display. After
all, she was the only female superhero in the movie, and I wanted to know if
she would be strong enough to keep up with The Big Boys. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: arial;"><span>Like good chocolate, strong
women come packaged in assorted ways. On Mother’s Day particularly, we women
consider our own mothers and wonder which of their strengths we carry forward.
I’ve found <b>it sometimes takes looking back a few generations to figure out who
we really are and where we get our strengths.</b></span></span><span style="font-family: "arial";"> <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-IRRPCxC39sU/T6589uPYKXI/AAAAAAAAAZY/5Kh_MlybYDU/s1600/AST.png" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><span style="font-family: arial;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-IRRPCxC39sU/T6589uPYKXI/AAAAAAAAAZY/5Kh_MlybYDU/s320/AST.png" width="248" /></span></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: arial;"><b><br />Athelia Sears Tanner (my mother)</b></span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: "arial";">My mom's mother was
a polygamist, the second wife of a man several years her senior who ruled the
roost in typical English style. So, every night like clockwork, Grandma Sears
faithfully and cheerfully served him a hot dinner on a freshly-pressed linen
tablecloth. She was a strong woman. She had to be. After she had ten children, her
husband and Aunt Aggie, the first wife who could never have children, were
called to serve a three-year church mission in Samoa, leaving Grandma Sears and
several daughters behind to manage the household. Fortunately, this grandma of
mine could pull it off because she was not only strong but also extremely
capable and, I think, secretly competitive. In those days, every Monday was
“wash day,” and she would arise early to be the first in the neighborhood to hang
her clean laundry on the line. Her energy and zest, though, did not seem to
get in the way of her compassion. In addition to looking after her own children,
she cared for all the widows she knew, faithfully baking homemade birthday cakes
for them every year.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-RgpC8CI5E5g/T659Fj7ewFI/AAAAAAAAAZg/Wnaf0Yl-1Us/s1600/Grandma+Sears.png" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><span style="font-family: arial;"><img border="0" height="396" src="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-RgpC8CI5E5g/T659Fj7ewFI/AAAAAAAAAZg/Wnaf0Yl-1Us/w282-h396/Grandma+Sears.png" width="282" /></span></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: arial;"><b><br />Athelia Viola Sears Call Irvine (my grandmother)</b></span></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: arial;">In spite of her heavy
workload, Grandma Sears had a legendary sweet demeanor. Called “an angel” by
those who knew her best, she sang from morning till night, encouraging her
children to work out differences by hugging each other, and her family swears
she never raised her own voice. As a mother and homemaker myself, I find such a
pleasant disposition to be remarkable and almost unbelievable. In fact, such
claims make it difficult to see much of myself in her.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal"><br /></div><div class="MsoNormal"><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"><img border="0" height="349" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-IjykTUUGT6o/T65-F8y2VYI/AAAAAAAAAZ4/CVni_c0stug/w293-h349/Mary+Theresa+Thompson.png" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;" width="293" /></td></tr><tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><b><span style="font-family: arial;"><br />Mary Theresa Thompson Call (my great-grandmother)</span></b></td></tr></tbody></table><div style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-IjykTUUGT6o/T65-F8y2VYI/AAAAAAAAAZ4/CVni_c0stug/s1600/Mary+Theresa+Thompson.png" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><span style="font-family: arial;"></span></a></div><span style="font-family: arial;"><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div></span></div><br /><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-6IqQOO0nQwU/T65-GQ0VmtI/AAAAAAAAAaA/JLBauMsUJNU/s1600/Pamela+Elizabeth+Barlow+Thompson.png" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><span style="font-family: arial;"><img border="0" height="353" src="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-6IqQOO0nQwU/T65-GQ0VmtI/AAAAAAAAAaA/JLBauMsUJNU/w304-h353/Pamela+Elizabeth+Barlow+Thompson.png" width="304" /></span></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: arial;"><b><br />Pamela Elizabeth Barlow Thompson (my great-great-grandmother)<br /><br /></b></span></td></tr></tbody></table><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial";">Going back further are two
more grandmas also full of kindness as well as fortitude and grit. Mary Theresa
Thompson Call was exiled three times from her home in Mexico during the Revolution;
however, in spite of the upheaval in her own life, she was always compassionate
and never idle. With a keen sense of who was suffering, she would often slip away from the dinner table to deliver a hot meal to a neighbor in need. Also
an excellent seamstress, she would frequently sew through the night so the dead
could be buried in proper funeral clothes within the 24-hour period allowed by
law. Her mother, Pamela Elizabeth Thompson, was kidnapped by Indians at age six
but, fortunately, rescued by her father, and later in life she gave birth to
her ninth child just six weeks after her husband was killed. Neither
grandmother was a stranger to tough times. These were strong women.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "arial";"><br /></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "arial";"><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="font-family: Times; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiPEIyhM5uUkBl6b57JvJSGQXTr0fme2kn0Feuj2Su1gCOxmpufBN3SP7o32a06-y9FGro0CcPCS_wAkvTvUhedxuWRPT2Suo3qLSuW39ILsnrkXWM_saLhNqy0X8rsnULw21LoLKNAsjfRhJslng9fVWOJlqAvmqO2KObIcpoFZ32XjyDDpe1E2VHKCLZL/s355/Elizabeth%20Haven%20Barlow.png" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><b><span style="font-family: arial;"><img border="0" data-original-height="355" data-original-width="260" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiPEIyhM5uUkBl6b57JvJSGQXTr0fme2kn0Feuj2Su1gCOxmpufBN3SP7o32a06-y9FGro0CcPCS_wAkvTvUhedxuWRPT2Suo3qLSuW39ILsnrkXWM_saLhNqy0X8rsnULw21LoLKNAsjfRhJslng9fVWOJlqAvmqO2KObIcpoFZ32XjyDDpe1E2VHKCLZL/w234-h320/Elizabeth%20Haven%20Barlow.png" title="Elizabeth Haven Barlow" width="234" /></span></b></a></td></tr><tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><b><span style="font-family: arial;"><br />Elizabeth Haven Barlow (my 3rd great-grandmother)<br /><br /></span></b></td></tr></tbody></table></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: arial; text-align: left;">Reaching back just one more generation, though, is a woman I can really relate to. Just two summers ago I learned about Elizabeth Haven Barlow, my 3<sup>rd</sup> great-grandmother. Talk about a strong woman! Described now in the 21<sup>st</sup> century, she may not sound very impressive, but in her time she was an independent thinker and a feisty feminist. Indeed, set in the context of the early 1800s, she emerges as a real fireball. Motherless at age nine, she sought comfort and learning in ancient books, old letters containing discussions about Puritanism, and the family Bible, which was </span><span style="font-family: arial; text-align: left;">her personal favorite</span><span style="font-family: arial; text-align: left;">. </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: arial; text-align: left;"><br /></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: arial; text-align: left;">Thus armed early with a deep and keen understanding of Christian beliefs, Elizabeth later boldly challenged her minister when he tried to convince her of false doctrine. On that very day, she left the church without compunction, taking her friends with her and never returning. This passion for truth stayed with her throughout her life. In fact, her intellectual curiosity motivated her to pursue a teaching degree from Amherst and Bradford Colleges at a time when most American women had very little education, thus “fulfilling one of her heart’s greatest desires,” as her daughter would later report. </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: arial; text-align: left;"><br /></span></div><div class="MsoNormal">
<span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"><span style="font-family: "arial";">When I “met” Elizabeth, I finally realized whose blood was in my veins. I felt I met part of myself and that I
finally fit in with this group of strong women. Like Elizabeth, </span><span style="font-family: "arial";">I love a lively intellectual discussion and am </span><span style="font-family: "arial";">not the
retiring, quiet type. In fact, truth be told, I
openly challenge opinions, speak my mind freely, and have been known to
question authority.</span><span style="font-family: "arial";"> </span><span style="font-family: "arial";">Other kinds of strengths—patience,
kindness, and compassion—don’t come so easily to me.</span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: arial;"><span face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"><br /></span>
</span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: arial;"><b>We commonly revere gentle, soft-spoken, compliant women—the peacemakers and bread bakers—and raise eyebrows at outspoken,
nonconforming women.</b> Especially on Mother’s Day, it’s good to remember that all
kinds of women can be strong. I come from a long line of them. </span></div>
</div>
Janet Perryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01770684879072299091noreply@blogger.com6